Join us on WhatsApp
Join us on Viber

Jokes of the day for Thursday, 24 September 2020

Funny jokes, funny photo and funny video collected from the internet on Thursday, 24 September 2020

Let's Do It Again

After an MCAT exam, a father asks his son, "How did it go son?"
Young man, looking rather reproachful, replied, "It went well dad. In fact, it went so well that I will retake it again next year."

#joke #short
Joke | Source: A joke a day - Free Jokes of the Day Clean Funny Jokes via Email, Humor and Entertainment
  • Currently 2.83/10

Rating: 2.8/10 (12)

More snow

It was a disastrous year for the farmers. The snow fell and fell until the government relief agency had to step in and lend a hand.
"It must have been terrible," said the government man to a farmer. "All that snow."
"Could have been worse," calmly answered the farmer. "My neighbor had more snow than me."
"How's that?" asked the government man.
"More land," replied the farmer.
#joke
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Thursday, 02 July 2020
  • Currently 5.70/10

Rating: 5.7/10 (20)

SLIDESHOW #93 - Funny Photo Slideshow

 A Very Interesting Fact


Doctor: Did you know that there are more than 1,000 bones in the human body?
Larry: Shhh, doctor! There are three dogs outside in the waiting room!

#joke #short #doctor
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Saturday, 20 June 2020
  • Currently 4.06/10

Rating: 4.1/10 (16)

Jewish and Chinese Beginnings

"The Jewish people have observed their 5758th year as a people," the Hebrew teacher informed his class. "Consider that the Chinese have observed only their 4695th. What does this mean to you?"

After a reflective pause, one student volunteered, "Well, for one thing, the Jewish people had to do without Chinese food for 1063 years."

#joke
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Saturday, 07 October 2017
  • Currently 8.73/10

Rating: 8.7/10 (11)

The local bar was so sure that

The local bar was so sure that its bartender was the strongest man around that they offered a standing $1000 bet. The bartender would squeeze a lemon until all the juice ran into a glass, and hand the lemon to a patron. Anyone who could squeeze one more drop of juice out would win the money. Many people had tried over time (weight-lifters, longshoremen, etc.) but nobody could do it.
One day this scrawny little man came into the bar, wearing thick glasses and a polyester suit, and said in a tiny squeaky voice " I'd like to try the bet" After the laughter had died down, the bartender said OK, grabbed a lemon,and squeezed away. Then he handed the wrinkled remains of the rind to the little man.
But the crowd's laughter turned to total silence as the man clenched his fist around the lemon and six drops fell into the glass. As the crowd cheered, the bartender paid the $1000, and asked the little man "what do you do for a living? Are you a lumberjack, a weight-lifter, or what?"
The man replied "I work for the IRS."
#joke
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Monday, 23 January 2017
  • Currently 7.20/10

Rating: 7.2/10 (5)

I had a communist lover. She l

I had a communist lover. She left Marx all over my body. They're only visible from certain Engels.
#joke #short
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Monday, 03 October 2016
  • Currently 4.88/10

Rating: 4.9/10 (8)

Chuck Norris listens to "Requi...

Chuck Norris listens to "Requiem for a Tower" when he eats pancakes.
#joke #short #chucknorris
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Tuesday, 24 September 2013
  • Currently 3.12/10

Rating: 3.1/10 (50)

Dating a Nun

Did you hear about the guy who tried to date a nun?
He wanted to take her to the county fair, but she declined on account of she had taken a vow abstaining from Carnival pleasures.
- Joke shared by Beliefnet member BeerLover

#joke #beer
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Thursday, 24 September 2009
  • Currently 4.19/10

Rating: 4.2/10 (48)

Sticks and stones may break yo...

Sticks and stones may break your bones, but a Chuck Norris glare will liquify your kidneys.
#joke #short #chucknorris
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Saturday, 24 September 2011
  • Currently 2.80/10

Rating: 2.8/10 (45)

Best room in the hotel?

The drunk staggered up to the hotel reception and demanded his room be changed.

"But sir," said the clerk, "you have the best room in the hotel."

"I insist on another room!!" said the drunk.

"Very good, sir. I`ll change you from 502 to 555. Would you mind telling me why you don't like 502?" asked the clerk.

"Well, for one thing," said the drunk, "it's on fire."

#joke
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Friday, 24 September 2010
  • Currently 4.77/10

Rating: 4.8/10 (43)

Kangaroo Sleepovers

A kangaroo mom with seven babies in her pouch told another kangaroo mom, "These sleepovers are killing me."

#joke #short
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Tuesday, 24 September 2013
  • Currently 6.25/10

Rating: 6.3/10 (36)

Icing

A young man was visiting his brother and sister-in-law for the holidays. As he arrived at their house he found his young nephew, Timmy, helping them bake some cupcakes.

After they were done, his sister-in-law allowed Timmy to put the icing on. When the boy had finished, he brought them to the table.

"The cupcakes look delicious, Tim." his uncle said. He took a bite and said, "Timmy these are so good."

As he finished cupcake and took another, he again complimented his little nephew. "The cupcakes look beautiful, Tim," his uncle said. "How did you get the icing so neat?"

His nephew replied, "It was easy. I just licked them."

The uncle turned pale. He pointed to the plate of cupcakes. "You licked all of these?"

Timmie replied, "Well no. After a while my tongue got tired, and I got the dog to help."

#joke
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Sunday, 31 May 2015
  • Currently 6.72/10

Rating: 6.7/10 (18)

I wish people would stop making fun of fat people

I wish people would stop making fun of fat people – they have enough sh-t on their plates.

Eddie Murphy (April 3 1961-)

Picture: Getty Images

#joke #short
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Saturday, 07 March 2015
  • Currently 3.00/10

Rating: 3.0/10 (2)

23 'What do you call' Jokes to start week with some laugh

1. What do you call a rabbit with fleas?
Bugs Bunny

2. What do you call a sleepwalking nun?
A roamin’ Catholic

3. What do you call a man with a seagull on his head?
Cliff

4. What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef!

5. What do you call a sad cup of coffee?
A depresso!

6. What do you call a dinosaur with a bandage on?
Dino-sore.

7. What do you call an old snowman?
Water

8. What do you call something that’s easy to get into, but hard to get out of?
Trouble

9. What do you call a woman with a screwdriver in one hand, a knife in the other, a pair of scissors between the toes on her left foot, and a corkscrew between the toes on her right foot?
A Swiss Army wife

10. What do you call a soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray?
A seasoned veteran

11. What do you call the wife of a hippie?
A Mississippi!

12. What do you call a meditating wolf?
Aware wolf!

13. What do you call an American bee?
A USB!

14. What do you call a fish with no eyes?
A fsh!

15. What do you call a doctor who fixes websites?
A URL-ologist

16. What do you call a destroyed angle?
A rect-angle!

17. What do you call a guy with a rubber toe?
Roberto!

18. What do you call the security guards who work for Samsung?
The Guardians of the Galaxy

19. What do you call a priest who becomes a lawyer?
A father-in-law!

20. What do you call a woman with her briefcase stuck in a tree?
A branch manager!

21. What do you call a sheep with no legs?
A cloud!

22. What do you call a man wearing a belt with a watch on it?
A waist of time!

23. What do you call your daughter’s boyfriend when he brings her home late?
An ambulance

#joke #doctor #lawyer #short
Joke | Source: Jokes of The Day - By Jokes of the day visitor
  • Currently 7.13/10

Rating: 7.1/10 (8)

Women and Bad Weather

Q: What do women, tornadoes and hurricanes have in common?
A: They all get the house.
#joke #short
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Wednesday, 09 December 2009
  • Currently 5.06/10

Rating: 5.1/10 (32)

Jokes Archive

NOTE: All jokes on this web site are property of the sites they are collected from. Web site Jokes of the day is not responsible for content of jokes. We are not trying to offend, just looking for a good laugh!! If you are offended by any of the jokes, please complain to the site jokes are coming from.
This site uses cookies to store information on your computer. Some are essential to help the site properly. Others give us insight into how the site is used and help us to optimize the user experience. See our privacy policy.