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Jokes of the day for Saturday, 25 June 2022

Funny jokes, funny photo and funny video collected from the internet on Saturday, 25 June 2022

Hungry, Hungry Eve

After the fall, Adam was walking with his sons Cain and Abel. As they were passing the locked gates of the Garden of Eden, one of the boys asked, “What’s this?”Adam replied, “Boys, that’s where your mother ate us out of house and home.”
#joke #short
Joke | Source: Belief net - Joke of the day, features on religion, spirituality, faith
  • Currently 3.67/10

Rating: 3.7/10 (15)

The Good and Bad

I finally quit drinking for good...
Now I'm just gonna drink for evil.

#joke #short
Joke | Source: A joke a day - Free Jokes of the Day Clean Funny Jokes via Email, Humor and Entertainment
  • Currently 4.10/10

Rating: 4.1/10 (10)

SLIDESHOW #81 - Funny Photo Slideshow

The birth of Eve

God asks asks Adam how he's doing, - "Well, it's ok but I am abit lonely".

"Ok" God answers. - "Let's do something about it. I can give you the most wonderful and satisfactory being and friend you'll ever need you'll never be lonely again, and you'll have everything you ever need".

"But it means I need your arm and leg to create that being".

Adam ponders and isn't willing to sacrifice his arm and leg. -"Ok" God says again.

"With only your leg, I can make a nice and welcoming partner for you, giving you no grief only happiness"

Adam ponders again - he is rather lonely but really wants his leg.

Adam and Eve

"What can I get for one of my rib bones ?" Adam finally replies

#joke
  • Currently 3.82/10

Rating: 3.8/10 (11)

The wedding...

Attending a wedding for the first time, a little girl whispered to her mother, "Why is the bride dressed in white?"

"Because white is the color of happiness, and today is the happiest day of her life," her mother tried to explain, keeping it simple.

The child thought about this for a moment, then said, "So why's the groom wearing black?"

#joke
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Monday, 08 July 2019
  • Currently 8.72/10

Rating: 8.7/10 (25)

ISIS wine cri

ISIS wine critics are always shouting “Curse the Zinfandels!”
#joke #short
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Monday, 11 January 2016
  • Currently 5.40/10

Rating: 5.4/10 (5)

Some kids play Kick the can. C...

Some kids play Kick the can. Chuck Norris played Kick the keg.
#joke #short #chucknorris
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Saturday, 25 June 2011
  • Currently 2.11/10

Rating: 2.1/10 (47)

Computer Problem Report Form

Describe your problem:

Now, describe the problem accurately:

Speculate wildly about the cause of the problem:

Problem Severity:

A. Minor

B. Minor

C. Minor

D. Trivial

Nature of the problem:

A. Locked Up

B. Frozen

C. Hung

D. Shot

Is your computer plugged in? Yes No

Is it turned on? Yes No

Have you tried to fix it yourself? Yes No

Have you made it worse? Yes

Have you read the manual? Yes No

Are you sure you've read the manual? Yes No

Are you absolutely certain you've read the manual? No

Do you think you understood it? Yes No

If `Yes' then why can't you fix the problem yourself?

How tall are you? Are you above this line?

What were you doing with your computer at the time the problem occurred?

If `nothing' explain why you were logged in.

Are you sure you aren't imagining the problem? Yes No

How does this problem make you feel?

Tell me about your childhood

Do you have any independent witnesses of the problem? Yes No

Can't you do something else, instead of bothering me? Yes

#joke
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Friday, 25 June 2010
  • Currently 3.38/10

Rating: 3.4/10 (42)

Fred & Saddam

Q: How is Saddam like Fred Flintstone?

A: Both look out their windows and see Rubble.

#joke #short
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Saturday, 25 June 2011
  • Currently 3.37/10

Rating: 3.4/10 (38)

Juston McKinney: Parking Tickets in New York

The first ticket I got in Manhattan I thought was a misprint. Im like, No, this has got to be a mistake. You put a quarter in the meter out there and it runs out, its a $55 fine. Thats a little excessive. Now, I could see it if you parked in a handicapped persons living room, but not for the meter running out. It goes from 25 cents to $55. Thats a 22,000% increase.
#joke
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Friday, 25 June 2010
  • Currently 3.50/10

Rating: 3.5/10 (32)

You're trapped in a room w...

Q: You're trapped in a room with a tiger, a rattlesnake and a lawyer. You have a gun with two bullets. What should you do?
A: Shoot the lawyer. Twice.
#joke #short #lawyer
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Monday, 15 June 2015
  • Currently 7.50/10

Rating: 7.5/10 (2)

Imagination

Several weeks after a young man had been hired, he was called into the personnel manager’s office.
“What is the meaning of this?” the manager asked. “When you applied for the job, you told us you had 5 years’ experience. Now we discover this is the first job you’ve ever had.”
“Well,” the young man said, “in your ad you said you wanted somebody with imagination.”

#joke
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Thursday, 23 September 2021
  • Currently 7.44/10

Rating: 7.4/10 (16)

The Healer

A semi-crippled Libertarian came into a bar and with difficulty, hoisted his bad leg over the bar stool, pulled himself up and asked for a sip of whiskey.

He looked down the bar and asked, "Is that Jesus down there?"

The bartender nodded and the Libertarian told him to give Jesus a whiskey also.

The next patron was an ailing Republican with a hunched back who moved slowly.

He shuffled up to the barstool and asked for a glass of wine. He also looked down the bar and asked if that was Jesus.

The bartender nodded and the Republican said to give Him a glass of wine also.

The third patron, a Democrat, swaggered in and said "Barkeep, give me a cold beer.

Hey, is that Jesus down there?"

The barkeep nodded, and the Democrat told him to give Jesus a cold one too.

As Jesus got up to leave, he walked over and touched the Libertarian and said, "For your kindness, you are healed!"

The Libertarian felt the strength come back to his leg, and he got up and danced a jig all the way to the door.

Jesus touched the republican and said, "For your kindness you are healed!"

The Republican felt his back straighten. He danced with joy and did a flip.

As Jesus walked toward the Democrat, the Democrat jumped back and exclaimed, "Don't touch me, I'm drawing disability!"

#joke #beer
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Tuesday, 01 December 2015
  • Currently 6.58/10

Rating: 6.6/10 (12)

Chris Rock: Natural Causes

When you die at 72, no matter what you die of, its natural causes. Even if you get hit by a truck, its natural causes. Cause if you was younger, youd got out of the way.
#joke #short
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Tuesday, 07 December 2010
  • Currently 4.74/10

Rating: 4.7/10 (61)

I understand how gem...

“I understand how gems were made. The concept is crystal clear to me.”

#joke #short
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Wednesday, 18 January 2017
  • Currently 8.33/10

Rating: 8.3/10 (3)

A man asked his doctor if he t...

A man asked his doctor if he thought he'd live to be a hundred. The doctor asked the man, "Do you smoke or drink?"
"No," he replied, "I've never done either."
"Do you gamble, drive fast cars, and fool around with women?" inquired the doctor.
"No, I've never done any of those things either."
"Well then," said the doctor, "what do you want to live to be a hundred for?"
#joke #doctor
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Sunday, 05 September 2021
  • Currently 9.27/10

Rating: 9.3/10 (44)

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