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Short jokes - funny one liners (3721 to 3760)Short funny jokes. These jokes are less 300 chars long, so easy to remember! These are the jokes listed 3721 to 3760. |
“Though I may be brok
“Though I may be broke, I still feel compelled to pay people compliments.”
Better Than Botox?
Q. What's the name of a face lotion developed for Jewish women? A. Oil of Oy Vey- Joke shared by Beliefnet member BeliefnetSabee“My math class starte
“My math class started working on 2D shapes, but I lost interest. It was just too plane.”
Innkeeper: The room is $15
Innkeeper: The room is $15 a night. It's $5 if you make your own bed.Guest: I'll make my own bed.
Innkeeper: Good. I'll get you some nails and wood.
Q&A: Before Boaz Married
Q: What kind of man was Boaz before he married?A: RuthlessQ: What do they call pastors in Germany?A: German shepherds.“When I was referred
“When I was referred to a Dietician by my GP, I weighed the pros and cons of it.”
Pamela:''You're half an hour late...
Pamela: "You're half an hour late. I've been standing here like a fool." Candance: "I can't help how you stand."
Good Question!
And Moses looked upon the Lord and said:"We are your chosen people and you want us to cut the tips off of our WHAT?"“Overcome with the be
“Overcome with the beauty of Earth seen from space, the astronaut removed his helmet. The view was breath taking.”
Prosecutor: I'll ask you one
Prosecutor: I'll ask you one last time, did you kill the victim?Defendant: No sir, I did not.
Prosecutor: Do you know what the penalties are for perjury?
Defendant: Yes sir, I do. And I know they're a lot better than the penalty for murder.
A Birthday Wish
Little Sonia was shouting her prayers. "Please God send me a new doll for my birthday. "Her mother, overhearing this, said, "Don't shout dear, God isn't deaf."
"No, but Grandad is, and he's in the next room," Sonia replied.
When I die, I want to go peace
When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep -- not screaming, like the passengers in his car.An Apocalyptic One-Liner
Every time someone predicts the date of the end of the world, God pushes the date back a little just to be funny.A Twist on 'Oy Vey!'
Q: Have you heard the new Jews for Jesus prayer? A: Oy vey, Maria!“When I suggested tha
“When I suggested that my wife should alphabetize her recipes, she would have nothing of the sort.”
Climbing into bed last night . . . . . . . .
As I was getting in bed, she said, 'You’re drunk'.
I said, 'How do you know?'
She said, 'You live next door . . . . .'
My Girlfriend Isn't Talking to Me
Apparently, I ruined her birthday.
Not sure how I did that...
I didn't even know it was her birthday!
“Be careful when talk
“Be careful when talking about physics around Darth Vader, he is very force sensitive.”
“Having rumpled cloth
“Having rumpled clothing is a pressing issue, but I am sure that I can iron out a solution.”
Five year old Little Johnny wa...
Five year old Little Johnny was lost, so he went up to a policeman and said, "I've lost my dad!"The policeman said, "What's he like?"
Little Johnny replied, "Beer and women!"
The storm chaser was...
“The storm chaser was so fascinated by tornadoes that he tended to get carried away.”
“Soap operas give a g
“Soap operas give a good lather making viewers to froth and bubble!”
Heaven's Unitarian Population
Why are there are no Unitarians in Heaven?Because they heard there was a choice between going to Heaven or a discussion group about the existence of Heaven.“The serial killer wa
“The serial killer was cut-throat in his business dealings and that's why he always made a killing.”
“Whenever the boy fou
“Whenever the boy found himself in hot water his temper would boil.”
“When words newly coi
“When words newly coined are included in the dictionary, it brings about many a change!”