Too Little, Too Late
A man arrived at the Pearly Gates, waiting to be admitted. St. Peter opened the gate and said, â€œIâ€™ve been checking your file. I canâ€™t see that you did anything really good in your life, but you never did anything bad either. Iâ€™ll tell you whatâ€”if you can tell me one really good deed that you did, Iâ€™ll admit you.â€
So the man answered, â€œOnce I was driving down the road and saw a gang of thugs attaching a poor man along the side of the road. So I pulled over, got out of my car, grabbed a tire iron, and walked straight up to the gangâ€™s leaderâ€”a huge, ugly guy with a chain running from his nose to his ear. Undaunted, I ripped the chain out of his ear and smashed him over the head with the tire iron. Then I turned around and, wielding my tire iron, yelled to the rest of them, â€œYou all leave this poor man alone! Go home before I teach you a lesson youâ€™ll never forget!â€
Impressed, St. Peter asked, â€œReally? I canâ€™t seem to find this in your file. When did all this happen?â€
"Oh, about two minutes ago.â€
This joke was reprinted from "Laugh Yourself Healthy" by Charles and Frances Hunter, with permission of Strang Communications. Copyright 2008. All rights reserved.
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