Popular jokes (6736 to 6750)Jokes sorted by popularity on social networks. Popularity is sum of all all comments, likes, pluses, tweets, etc. is new measure, independant from rating with our star rating system. |
A teacher was giving a lesson...
A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood. Trying to make the matter clearer, she said, "Now, class, if I stood on my head, the blood, as you know, would run into it, and I would turn red in the face..""Yes," the class said.
"Then why is it that while I am standing upright in the ordinary position the blood doesn't run into my feet?"
A little fellow shouted,
"Cause your feet ain't empty."
Food chain
After discussing the “food chain” with my fifth grade class, I told them their weekend homework was to write a sentence showing they understood the meaning of the term.
On Monday morning, one student handed this in: “Burger King is my favorite food chain.”
Writing Letters To Son
The following is supposedly a true story. To be included, besides being true, the story is most likely strange, weird, surprising, or funny.One student fell into a cycle of classes, studying, working and sleeping.
Didn't realize how long he had neglected writing home until he received the following note:
"Dear Son, Your mother and I enjoyed your last letter. Of course, we were much younger then, and more impressionable. Love, Dad."
I don't mind kids p...
“I don't mind kids playing hopscotch in most places, but my driveway is where I draw the line.”
A little boy asked the parish priest a question. Little Boy: “Father I heard you once say that we all came from dust.” Parish…
A little boy asked the parish priest a question.
Little Boy: “Father I heard you once say that we all came from dust.”
Parish priest, “That's right I did say that”.
Little boy: “And Father I heard you say that when we die we go back to dust.”
Parish Priest: “That's right, I did say that. I am glad you were listening so very well”.
Little Boy: “Well Father I think you should come to my place and look under my bed because someone is either coming or going”!
Source: CleanJokes4U
The sacrifice....
A married couple was in a terrible accident where the woman's face was severely burned. The doctor told the husband that they couldn't graft any skin from her body because she was too skinny.
So the husband offered to donate some of his own skin. However, the only skin on his body that the doctor felt was suitable would have to come from his buttocks.
The husband and wife agreed that they would tell no one about where the skin came from, and requested that the doctor also honor their secret. After all, this was a very delicate matter.
After the surgery was completed, everyone was astounded at the woman's new beauty. She looked more beautiful than she ever had before! All her friends and relatives just went on and on about her youthful beauty!
One day, she was alone with her husband, and she was overcome with emotion at his sacrifice. She said, "Dear, I just want to thank you for everything you did for me. There is no way I could ever repay you."
"My darling," he replied, "think nothing of it. I get all the thanks I need every time I see your mother kiss you on the cheek."
The End Of The Ham
A young woman was preparing a ham dinner. After she cut off the end of the ham, she placed it in a pan for baking.
Her friend asked her,Why did you cut off the end of the ham?
And she replied ,I really dont know but my mother always did, so I thought you were supposed to.
Later when talking to her mother she asked her why she cut off the end of the ham before baking it, and her mother replied, I really dont know, but thats the way my mom always did it.
A few weeks later while visiting her grandmother, the young woman asked, Grandma, why is it that you cut off the end of a ham before you bake it?
Her grandmother replied, Well dear, otherwise it would never fit into my baking pan.
Small child picked
'I was not a particularly small child. I was the one who always got picked to play Bethlehem in the school nativity.'
Jo Brand (July 23 1957-)
Picture: Craig Sugden
The judge warned the witness, ...
The judge warned the witness, “Do you understand that you have sworn to tell the truth?” “I do.”“Do you understand what will happen if you are not truthful?”
“Sure,” said the witness. “My side will win.”
How Many Women?
A little boy was attending his first wedding. After the service, his cousin asked him, "How many women can a man marry?"
"Sixteen," the boy responded.
His cousin was amazed that he knew the answer so quickly. "How do you know that?"
"Easy," the little boy said.
"All you have to do is add it up, like the Preacher said: 4 better, 4 worse, 4 richer, 4 poorer."
Kiwi family arrives in Austral...
Kiwi family arrives in Australia.Kiwi family arrives in Australia.
Son's first day at school and the father say's
"OK son what happened at school today"
"I topped the class at Math's today".
"Well son thats because your a New zealander"
Second day at school and the father say's
"what happened at school today"
"I topped class in English"
"Well son thats because your a New zealander".
Third day at school and the father say's
"What happened at school today"
"We played mini Rugby and after the game we were in the shower's and I noticed that I had a bigger wasser than all the other boys"
"Is that because I am a New zealander Dad".
"No son" the father relied "that's because your 27".
Where No Man has gon
Two young brothers, aged 5 and 6, are listening through the keyhole as their older sister is getting it on with her new boyfriend.They hear her say, "Oh, Jim, you're going where no man has gone before!"
The six-year-old says to his brother, "He must be fucking her up the ass!"
