The best jokes (19006 to 19020)The best jokes rated by site visitors. Top rated jokes. These are the best jokes rated 19006 to 19020. NOTE jokes sometimes might seem not to be in order. Due to better performance joke top list is refreshed only once daily. |
“A teacher harshly co
“A teacher harshly corrected a student on a math problem. I guess he got schooled.”
#joke #short
What does an archer send his e
What does an archer send his ex-lover on Valentine's Day? A: Arrows.#joke #short
The server at the restaurant t
The server at the restaurant told such awful jokes, it was torture. I wanted him charged with waiterboreding#joke #short
Which Chinese leader always fi
Which Chinese leader always finished his holiday purchases early? Deng Xiaoping.#joke #short
Hannibal Buress: Cancer Walks
I don't believe in cancer walks. Well, I believe in them because they exist but I'd rather just give money straight up and save my Saturday afternoon. I can make my own t-shirt, that's not incentive. Plus I don't think cancer responds to how far people walk. I don't think cancer's sitting at home, 'What? How many people walked how far? How many people walked how far wearing the same shirt? That's crazy! I'm out of here!' Remission. #joke
The necrophiliac gold-digger m
The necrophiliac gold-digger married a drowned corpse because she heard he was bloated.#joke #short
Lightbulb Joke Collection 01
Q: How many gypsies does it take to change a lightbulb ?
A: None, but you lose a lot of light bulbs.
Note: None because gypsies don't have mains electricity, and the losing is a play on the larcenous reputation of Gypsies. You give a Gypsy a light bulb and ask him to change the hallway lamp, pretty soon you have one less light bulb and the hallway lamp is still out.)
Q: How many Helmsley employees does it take to change a lightbulb ?
A: 100: 99 to try, and one to fire them all.
Note: Leona Helmsley is the owner of a New York hotel who was a terrible person to work for. She fired employees at little or no provocation. She was so nasty to her employees that she was known as the "Queen of Mean".)
Q: How many pot growers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: None, they use fluorescent bulbs instead.
Note: Fluorescent light is closer to natural sunlight than an incandescent bulb, so anyone using artificial light (which pot growers might do to keep their crops covered and safe from flying, prying eyes) to grow stuff would probably use fluorescent light rather than incandescent.
#joke
“When trying to curry
“When trying to curry favour with 16th Century French Protestants, it isn't what you know, it is Huguenot.”
#joke #short
Knock Knock Collection 192
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Weirdo!
Weirdo who?
Weirdo you think you're going!
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Welcome!
Welcome who?
Welcome up and see me sometime!
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Wendy!
Wendy who?
Wendy come to take you away I won't stop them!
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Wes!
Wes who?
Wes Side Story!
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Wheelbarrow!
Wheelbarrow who?
Wheelbarrow some money and go on holiday!
#joke
“If you see cattle we
“If you see cattle wearing shin pads then you know they are on a weight loss program to reduce grazing.”
#joke #short
If you buy your degree, is tha
If you buy your degree, is that a collegin' implant?#joke #short
“Carly Simon was in a
“Carly Simon was in a vineyard when she got the idea for the song, 'You're So Vine'.”
#joke #short
“Great batsmen in cri
“Great batsmen in cricket retire because they can't push their boundaries further in their field!”
#joke #short
When you tell someone off, do
When you tell someone off, do so F.U.sively.#joke #short
