Steven Wright 26
All the plants in my house are dead--I shot them last night. I was torturing them by watering them with ice cubes.
I put my air conditioner in backwards. It got cold outside. The weatherman on TV was confused. "It was supposed to be hot today."
I was in a job interview and I opened a book and started reading. Then I said to the guy, "Let me ask you a question. If you are in a spaceship that is traveling at the speed of light, and you turn on the headlights, does anything happen?" He said, "I don't know." I said, "I don't want your job."
I was in the first submarine. Instead of a periscope, they had a kaleidoscope. "We're surrounded."
Last time I went camping, I accidentally borrowed a circus tent. I didn't know until I got there and set it up. People complained because they couldn't see the lake. There was a forest nearby, but it wasn't a regular forest. It was a forest made out of paneling. It was a long, thin forest.
When I turned two I was really anxious, because I'd doubled my age in a year. I thought, if this keeps up, by the time I'm six I'll be ninety.
Sponges grow in the ocean. That just kills me. I wonder how much deeper the ocean would be if that didn't happen.
I put instant coffee in a microwave oven and almost went back in time.
It's a fine night to have an evening.
#joke #drinks #coffee
Joke of the day - Steven Wright 26
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Different people consider different jokes funny, so joke can not satisfy taste for everyone. Some people like Lawyer jokes, other do not consider lawers jokes funny.
People developing software, or doing anything with the software my consider some geek stuff funny, but it might not be funny for the others.
We try to deliver best jokes every day. But, it depends on sites we take jokes from. Besides jokes, find funny photos and funny videos. Great archive so far, years of collected jokes.
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