You might be a nurse if...

• When using a public restroom, you wash your hands with soap for

a full minute and turn off the faucets with your elbows.

• Your favorite dream is the one where you leave a mess at a patient's

bedside and tell a doctor to clean it up.

• Men assume you might be great in bed because of the 9 million porn

movies about nurses.

• Everyone, including complete strangers, tells you about each and

every ache and pain they have.

• You want to put your foot through the TV screen every time you see

a nurse on a soap opera doing nothing but talking on the phone and

flirting with doctors.

• You can almost SEE the germs on doorknobs and telephones.

• You can watch the goriest movie and eat anything afterwards, even

spaghetti with lots of tomato sauce.

• You use a plastic 30cc medicine cup for a shotglass.