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Christmas jokes - jokes about christmas day (211 to 225)Jokes about christmas day. These are the jokes listed 211 to 225. |
Myra was going to the Christma
Myra was going to the Christmas office party but needed a new party dress.In the clothing store she asked, "May I try on that dress in the window, please?"
"Certainly not, madam," responded the salesgirl, "You'll have to use the fitting room like everyone else."
Freddie and John were fortunat
Freddie and John were fortunate enough to have a season ticket to watch Chelsea. They could not help noticing that there was always a spare seat (B14) next to them and they had a friend who would love to buy a season ticket, especially if all three could have seats together.One half-time Freddie went to the ticket office and asked if they could by buy the season ticket for B14. The official said that unfortunately the ticket had been sold. Nevertheless, week after week the seat was still empty.
Then on Boxing day, much to Freddie and Eddie's amazement the seat was taken for the first time that season. John could not resist asking the newcomer, "Where have you been all season?"
"Don't ask," he said, "My wife bought the season ticket back last summer, and kept it for a surprise Christmas present."
Christmas QA jokes part three
Q: What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?
A: Santa paws!!!
Q: What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?
A: Silent night!
Q: What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?
A: Ice cream.
Q: Why do mummys like the holidays?
A: Becuse of all the wrapping!
Q: Why don’t aliens celebrate Chistmas?
A: Because they don’t want to give away their presence.
Q: When does New Year’s Day come before Christmas Day?
A: Every year!
Q: Why does everybody like Frosty the Snowman?
A: Because he is so cool!
Q.Which reindeer likes to clean?
A.Comet
Christmas Present
It was the day after Christmas at a church in San Francisco. Pastor Mike was looking at the nativity scene outside when he noticed the baby Jesus was missing from the figures.Immediately, Pastor Mike turned towards the church to call the police. But as he was about to do so, he saw little Jimmy with a red wagon, and in the wagon was the figure of the little infant, Jesus.
Pastor Mike walked up to Jimmy and said, "Well, Jimmy, where did you get the little infant?" Jimmy replied, "I got him from the church."
"And why did you take him?"
With a sheepish smile, Jimmy said, "Well, about a week before Christmas I prayed to little Lord Jesus. I told him if he would bring me a red wagon for Christmas, I would give him a ride around the block in it."
Donkeys at Christmas
Q: What do donkeys send out near Christmas?
A: Mule-tide greetings.
Yo momma is so fat, I took a p
Yo momma is so fat, I took a picture of her last Christmas and it's still printing.Post Office
A blonde goes to the post office to buy stamps for her Christmas cards. She says to the clerk, "May I have 50 Christmas stamps?"
The clerk says, "What denomination?"
The woman says, "God help us. Has it come to this? Give me 6 Catholic, 12 Presbyterian, 10 Lutheran and 22 Baptists."
Christmas QA jokes part two
Q: What do you call a cat sitting on the beach on Christmas Eve?
A: Sandy Claws.
Q: Where does the snowman hide his money?
A: In the snow bank.
Q: What type of cars do elves drive?
A: Toy-otas.
Q: Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?
A: It needed to be trimmed.
Q: What kind of motorcycle does Santa ride?
A: Holly Davidson.
Q: What do you call a bankrupt Santa?
A: Saint Nickel-less.
Christmas Knock, knock joke
Knock, knock
Who’s there?
Merry.
Merry who?
Merry Christmas!
Christmas Eve Accident
Three men die in a car accident Christmas Eve. They all find themselves at the pearly gates waiting to enter Heaven. On entering they must present something related to or associated with Christmas. The first man searches his pockets and finds mistletoe, so he is allowed in.
The second man presents a candy cane, so he is also allowed in.The third man pulls out a pair of stockings.
Confused at this last gesture, St. Peter asks, "How do these represent Christmas?"
"They're Carol's."
Santa Claus's Plans
Q: Why does Santa Claus go down the chimney on Christmas Eve?
A: It soots him.
