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Short jokes - funny one liners (1161 to 1200)Short funny jokes. These jokes are less 300 chars long, so easy to remember! These are the jokes listed 1161 to 1200. |
A guy was standing glumly at t
A guy was standing glumly at the bar."What's up?" asked his friend.
"My wife suggested we should play some sex games to spice up our love lives."
"Yeah, what's wrong with that?"
"Well, unfortunately 'Guess who I shagged last night?' didn't go down too well."
Answering Service
"Your call is very important to us...
... Please enjoy this 40-minute flute solo."
Whenever I see a broken elevat
Whenever I see a broken elevator I tend to stair.The Darn Bug
Boy: "This darn bug is bothering the heck out of me! Where’s that can of spray insecticide... Oh, here it is. GOTCHA! Oh wow, I never knew bugs had so much blood in them."
Girl: "You idiot, you used the can of red spray paint!"
Loggers often have back proble
Loggers often have back problems. Usually in their lumbar area.Millions of Americans are unab
Millions of Americans are unable to quit their jobs to join choirs. It's a crisis of affordable how-sing.I Ain't Had No Fun
The teacher wrote on the blackboard: "I ain’t had no fun all summer.”
“Now Paul,” she began, “what shall I do to correct this?”
“Get a boyfriend?” Paul replied.
I could never have predicted t
I could never have predicted the success of Geddy Lee and Rush. But then again, I'm no progrocksticator.I faint when I'm bored,
I faint when I'm bored, because I can't stand the sight of blah.Cargo Space
Dad is down at the auto dealership, looking at potential choices.
“Cargo space?” he asks.
The salesman, slightly confused, finally replies, “Car no do that... car go road.”
That's the Rules
The teacher barks at Little Johnny, “Is that bubble gum in your mouth?"
Johnny nods.
"In the trash can! Right now!”
Little Johnny looks at the trash can, then back to the teacher, "With the bubble gum?"
What do pickpockets and politi
What do pickpockets and political writers have in common?It Takes A Village
I read somewhere that it takes a village to raise a child...
Where is this village and is there a number you can call?
Some punk teenager with bad skin always eczema house. #joke #short
Touching me with a feather dus
Touching me with a feather duster is a here I tickle act.If it weren't for half i
If it weren't for half its population, Belgium would have an unFlemished reputation.Arson?
A police officer says to a couple: "I'm sorry to tell you this, but your son set the school on fire".
They asked: “Arson?
The officer replies: “Yes, your son!”
Mr. Bigger
Mr. Bigger and Mrs. Bigger have a baby.
Who’s the biggest in the family?
The baby of course - because he’s a little Bigger.
Senior citizen expects discoun
Senior citizen expects discount at a supermarket: “Do you have any Grey Coupon?”Do our puns make you vomit? Th
Do our puns make you vomit? Then visit a refluxologist!NED: He
NED: Hear about the cock-fight at the Mexican bar?ED: No…
NED: They were drinking penis-collideas!
How Many Mystery Writers
How many mystery writers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Two - one to screw it most of the way and the other to give it a surprise twist at the end.
