Join us on WhatsApp
Join us on Viber

Jokes of the day for Friday, 11 April 2014

Funny jokes, funny photo and funny video collected from the internet on Friday, 11 April 2014

Amish paradise

Q: What is every Amish woman's fantasy?

A: Two menanite

#joke #short
Joke | Source: Comedy Central: Jokes - Jokes provided daily from Comedy Central's archive.
  • Currently 6.00/10

Rating: 6.0/10 (3)

“A curling iron is a ...

“A curling iron is a permanent solution to a hairy problem.”

#joke #short
  • Currently 6.00/10

Rating: 6.0/10 (6)

SLIDESHOW #43 - Funny Photo Slideshow

Funny jokes-Ear to the wall

John was a patient living in a mental hospital since many years. Lately, he had developed this habit of putting his ear to the wall and listening.

The hospital doctor would watch John do this day after day. One day, the doctor finally decided to see what John was listening to, so he put his ear up to the wall and listened. He heard nothing.

So he turned to John and said, "I don't hear anything."

John said, "Yeah, I know. It's been like that for many months now!"
#joke #doctor
Joke | Source: Really Funny Jokes - Really Funny jokes, adult jokes, Good jokes, short funny jokes, teacher jokes, affair jokes, kids jokes, doctor jokes, funny pictures
  • Currently 6.00/10

Rating: 6.0/10 (5)

Funny video of the day - What DJs Do These Days...

What DJs Do These Days... - Hard work! - link to page video is posted initially.
  • Currently 6.45/10

Rating: 6.5/10 (11)

One day while at her job as a ...

One day while at her job as a bank loan officer, Patty Black, had a frog hop onto her desk and say, "I would like to apply for a lily-pad improvement loan." Patty looked incredulously at the frog and said, "I'm sorry, we don't loan money to frogs." To which the frog replied, "I have collateral," as he handed her a small ceramic trinket. Not wanting to be impolite, Patty said, "I don't know. I'll have to talk to the bank manager."

She walked back to the manager's office and said, "There is a frog out here, asking for a lily-pad improvement loan, and this trinket is all he has for collateral." The bank manager picked up the trinket and looked at it carefully. Then smiling he turned to Patty and said, "Why it's a knick-knack, Patty Black. Give the frog a loan."

#joke
Joke | Source: A joke a day - Free Jokes of the Day Clean Funny Jokes via Email, Humor and Entertainment
  • Currently 2.71/10

Rating: 2.7/10 (7)

Funny Photo of the day - Chairs stapled to the wall

Chairs stapled to the wall - Or something else? | Source : Jokes of The Day - By Jokes of the day visitor
  • Currently 4.30/10

Rating: 4.3/10 (10)

The mirror...

An old man and his wife lived deep in the hills and seldomsaw many people. One day a peddler came by to sell his goods and asked the man if he or his wife wanted to buy anything.

"Well, my wife ain't home, she's gone down to the crick to wash clothes, but lemme see what you got," said the man.

The peddler showed him pots and pans, tools and gadgets, but the old man wasn't interested. Then the man spotted a mirror and said, "What's that?"

Before the peddler could tell him it was a mirror, the old man picked it up and said, "My God how'd you get a picture of my Pappy?"

The old man was so happy, he traded his wife's best pitcher for it. The peddler left before the wife came back and spoiled his sale.

The old man was worried that the wife would be mad at him for trading her best pitcher, so he hid it in the barn behind some boxes of junk. He would go out to the barn 2 or 3 times a day to look at the "picture" and eventually the wife got suspicious.

One day she got fed up and after he retired for the night, she went out to the barn. She saw the mirror behind the boxes, picked it up and said, "so this is the hussy he's been foolin'around with!"

#joke
  • Currently 4.67/10

Rating: 4.7/10 (3)

May I Borrow Your Dog For A Few Days?


It's for my mother-in-law," explained the mourner at the funeral procession. Tightening the leash, he gestured down at the dog and said, "My Doberman here killed her."
"Gee...That's terrible," commiserated the spectator. "But... Hmmmm... Is there anyway you might lend me your dog for a day or so?"
The bereaved son-in-law pointed his thumb over his shoulder and answered, "Get in line."

#joke
Joke | Source: Joke of the Day - Jokes served hot and fresh daily.
  • Currently 4.33/10

Rating: 4.3/10 (3)

Mine-sniffing dogs

The Army announced this week they are now training mine-sniffing dogs to go to Iraq.

How bad do you have to screw up at obedience school to get that job?

-Jay Leno

#joke #short
  • Currently 5.20/10

Rating: 5.2/10 (5)

Always on Call

A doctor answers his phone and hears the familiar voice of a colleague on the other end of the line.
‘We need a fourth for poker,' said the friend.
‘I'll be right over,' whispered the doctor.
As he was putting on his coat, his wife asked, ‘Is it serious?'

‘Oh yes, quite serious,' said the doctor gravely. ‘In fact, there are three doctors there already!'

Joke of the Day, posted everyday on getfrank.co.nz - Click to see the past weeks worth right here...

#joke #doctor
  • Currently 7.17/10

Rating: 7.2/10 (6)

Chuck Norris shot the sheriff,...

Chuck Norris shot the sheriff, but he round house kicked the deputy.
#joke #short #chucknorris
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Tuesday, 03 January 2012
  • Currently 3.61/10

Rating: 3.6/10 (49)

Complete and Finished

There is a subtle but important difference between the words "complete" and "finished."

When you marry the right one, you are complete.

When you marry the wrong one, you are finished.

And if the right one catches you with the wrong one, you are completely finished.

#joke #short
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Thursday, 11 April 2013
  • Currently 7.85/10

Rating: 7.9/10 (48)

A young lady came home from a ...

A young lady came home from a date, rather sad. She told her mother, "Jeff proposed to me an hour ago."

"Then why are you so sad?" her mother asked.

"Because he also told me he was an atheist. Mom, he doesn't even believe there's a hell."

Her mother replied, "Marry him anyway. Between the two of us, we'll show him how wrong he is."
#joke
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Saturday, 11 April 2009
  • Currently 8.00/10

Rating: 8.0/10 (41)

Actual Answer from a Medical Student

While making his rounds, a doctor points out an x-ray to a group of medical students.

“As you can see,” he says, “the patient limps because his left fibula and tibia are radically arched.”

The doctor turns to one of the students and asks, “What would you do in a case like this?”

“Well,” ponders the student, “I suppose I’d limp, too.”

#joke #doctor
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Sunday, 11 April 2010
  • Currently 7.06/10

Rating: 7.1/10 (35)

"Simon, if I had eight apples ...

"Simon, if I had eight apples in my right hand and ten apples in my left hand, what would I have?”

“Huge hands, sir.”
#joke #short
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Wednesday, 11 April 2012
  • Currently 5.32/10

Rating: 5.3/10 (28)

Do not annoy me this week

Do not annoy me this week, because if you do… I'll give your number to all the kids and tell them it's santa's hotline.
#joke #short
  • Currently 3.00/10

Rating: 3.0/10 (2)

Philip was enjoying the second...

Philip was enjoying the second week of a two-week vacation the same way he had enjoyed the first week: by doing as little as possible.
He ignored his wife Paula's not-so-subtle hints about completing certain jobs around the house, but Philip didn't realize how much this bothered her until the clothes dryer refused to work, the iron shorted and the sewing machine motor burned out in the middle of a seam. The final straw came when she plugged in the vacuum cleaner and nothing happened.
Paula looked so stricken that he had to offer some consolation.
"That's OK, darling," Philip said. "You still have me."
Paula looked up at him with tears in her eyes. "Yes, Philip," she wailed, "but you don't work either."
#joke
Joke | Source: Smilezilla - Daily Jokes and Funny Stories
  • Currently 8.00/10

Rating: 8.0/10 (7)

Jokes Archive

NOTE: All jokes on this web site are property of the sites they are collected from. Web site Jokes of the day is not responsible for content of jokes. We are not trying to offend, just looking for a good laugh!! If you are offended by any of the jokes, please complain to the site jokes are coming from.
This site uses cookies to store information on your computer. Some are essential to help the site properly. Others give us insight into how the site is used and help us to optimize the user experience. See our privacy policy.