Blonde jokes - jokes about blondes (466 to 480)

Eating Jell-o

What's the difference between having sex with a blonde and eating Jell-o?

Jell-o wiggles when you eat it.

Q: How can you tell if a fax c...

Q: How can you tell if a fax came from a blonde?
A: It has a stamp on it.
Q: Why do blondes have "TGIF" on their shoes?
A: Toes go in first.
Q: Why shouldn't blondes have coffee breaks?
A: It takes too long to retrain them.
Q: Did you hear about the two blondes that were found frozen to death in their car at a drive-in movie theater?
A: They went to see "Closed for the Winter."
Q: What did the blonde ask her doctor when he told her she was pregnant?
A: "Is it mine?"
Q: What did the blonde say when she saw the sign in front of the YMCA?
A: "Look! They spelled MACY's wrong!"
Q: What is every blonde's ambition in life?
A: To be like Vanna White and learn the alphabet.

Replacing Vanna

Q: Why is it so hard to replace Vanna White?

A: They can't find another blonde who knows the whole alphabet.

Blonde Cheer

Q: What's the blonde's cheer?

A: " I'm blonde, I'm

blonde, I'm B.L.O...ah, oh well..I'm blonde, I'm blonde, yea

yea yea..."

Oooucch!!!!!!!

How do you know a blonde has a bad day?

she's playing a pencil and she cant find her recorder!

Sally & Brenda

Sally and Brenda (both blondes) exited and locked the car in a hurry, forgetting to remove the key, which was in the ignition.

Realizing the mistake, Sally asked, "Why don't we get a coat hanger to open it."

"No, that won't work" answered Brenda. "People will think we're trying to break in."

So Sally suggested, "What if we use a pocket knife to cut around the rubber, then stick a finger in and pull up the lock?"

"No," said Brenda. "People will think we're too dumb to use a coat hanger."

"Well," sighed Sally, "we'd better think of something fast. It's starting to rain, and the sun roof is open!"

Into Thin Air

Question:

What do you call a hundred blondes stacked up on each other?

Answer:

An air mattress.

Making Cookies

Q: How many blonds does it take to make chocolate-chip

cookies?

A: 15, one to make the batter and 14 to peel the

M&M's

Rider

After a round of golf, four ladies sat around the club house, chatting.
Seeing the ladies, the Pro approached them and asked: "How did your game go?
The first lady, a brunette, said she had a good round ... making the comment that she actually had 25 riders. The Pro was a bit perplexed not knowing what a "Rider" was.
The second was a blonde lady who quickly chimed in and said that she had a very good round as well with 16 riders.
The third lady then said that her round was average and that she only had 10 riders.
The fourth lady admitted that she played the worst round of the day and that she only had 2 riders all day long.
The Pro was completely confused not knowing what the term "rider" meant. But, because he didn't want to look dumb, he made a quick polite remark, wished the ladies well and then left.
He then approached the bartender and asked "Hey, can you tell me what these ladies are talking about when they refer to "Riders"?"

The bartender simply smiled and said..."A 'Rider" is when you hit a shot long enough to ride on the golf cart to your ball.

Adding Blonde

Q: Why couldn't the blonde add 10 and seven on a calculator?
A: She couldn't find the 10 key.

Blonde one liners

How do you drown a blonde?

Put a 'scratch and sniff' sticker at the bottom of the pool.

Why does it take longer to build a blonde snowman as opposed to a regular one?

You have to hollow out the head.

How do you get a twinkle in a blonde's eye?

Shine a flashlight in her ear.

Why don't blondes like making Raro juice from sachets?

Because they can't fit eight cups of water in the packet.

Did you bear about the two blondes that were found frozen to death in their car at the drive-in movie theatre?

They went to see 'Closed for Winter'.

Hear about the blonde that got an AM radio?

It took her a month to realize she could play it at night.

What did the blonde say when she saw the sign in front of the YMCA?

'Look! They spelled Macy's wrong.'

Why did the blonde scale the chain-link fence?

To see what was on the other side.

How do you make a blonde laugh on Saturday?

Tell her a joke on Wednesday.

Why do blondes have 'TGIF' written on their shoes?

Toes Go In First.

Why did the blonde stare at the can of frozen orange juice?

Because it said concentrate.

Why do blondes always smile during lightning storms?

They think their picture is being taken.

How can you tell when a blonde sends you a fax?

It has a stamp on it.

What do you do if a blonde throws a pin at you?

Run, she's got a grenade in her mouth.

How can you tell if a blonde has been using your computer?

There is white-out all over the monitor.

Why shouldn't blondes have coffee breaks?

It takes too long to retrain them.

Three blondes were driving to Disneyland. After being in the car for four hours they finally saw a sign that said 'Disneyland Left' so they turned around and went home.

One blonde was on one side of ...

One blonde was on one side of the river and there was another blonde on the other side of the river. One blonde yells to the other blonde, "How do you get to the other side?" and the other blonde yells back, "You are on the other side!"

There are three blondes who ar...

There are three blondes who are on a road trip. As they are driving through the desert, their car breaks down. They have no phone to call anyone, so they decide to walk to the nearest city, several miles away. They each decide to take one thing to make the journey better. The first blonde takes the radio and says, "If we get bored, we can put the radio on and listen to music." The second blonde decides to take a wheel, "In case one of us gets really tired, we can go inside the wheel and be rolled." The third blonde takes the car door, "In case it gets too hot, we can roll down the window!"

Sex-Obsessed Blonde

Q: Why do some blondes only think about sex?

A: They're dirty blondes.

Say What Again?

Did you hear about the blonde who didn't catch the joke?

It went over her head!