|
Short jokes - funny one liners (5241 to 5280)Short funny jokes. These jokes are less 300 chars long, so easy to remember! These are the jokes listed 5241 to 5280. |
What do women put on their ears to look more attractive?
What do women put on their ears to look more attractive?
Their knees.
You have met your New Year's resolution
Now there are more overweight people in America than average-weight people. So overweight people are now average… which means, you have met your New Year's resolution. I Finn ally h
I Finn ally have a Scandinavian friend.Don't discuss units of h
Don't discuss units of heat with me. I will BTU!“I told the knight th
“I told the knight that I could knock him out of his saddle. Of course, I was speaking in joust.”
Saskatchewan has huge methane...
Saskatchewan has huge methane reserves – it must be one of the flatus places on Earth. Lighting a lantern is
Lighting a lantern is pure torcher.
“In very large sponge
“In very large sponge colonies in the ocean, there's a soaker born every minute.”
Who doesn't believe in S
Who doesn't believe in Santa? Yoko Ho No.Kittens
A three-year-old went with his dad to see a litter of kittens. On returning home, he breathlessly informed his mother there were two boy kittens and two girl kittens.
"How did you know?" his mother asked.
"Daddy picked them up and looked underneath," he replied. "I think it was printed on the bottom."
Which Chinese leader always fi
Which Chinese leader always finished his holiday purchases early? Deng Xiaoping.I tried to sign off Constipati
I tried to sign off ConstipationForum.com, butt I remain logged in.After convincing me to paint m
After convincing me to paint my testicles, my friend laughed dye a bollock ally.Ask a banker any question. He
Ask a banker any question. He will give you fine answers.Blind date
How was your blind date?" a college student asked her roommate.
"Terrible!" the room-mate answered. "He showed up in his 1932 Rolls Royce."
"Wow! That's a very expensive car. What's so bad about that?"
"He was the original owner."
Turkish terrorists need some h
Turkish terrorists need some help with their Ankara management problem.When the Grim Reaper...
“When the Grim Reaper sweeps through, we have a brush with death.”
I sneezed during a knock-knock
I sneezed during a knock-knock joke. Guesswhonteit!
So annoying! A UFO came and pu
So annoying! A UFO came and put a lien on my house.Wet t-shirt contests make good...
Wet t-shirt contests make good areola-tee television. Why would an hour gl...
“Why would an hour glass only take half an hour to finish? It was filled with quick sand.”
Squirrels that just...
“Squirrels that just don't care anymore have been seen throwing cashews to the wind.”
Trump chose a leaky bottle of...
Trump chose a leaky bottle of vinegar for his cabinet. The press wrote ,”Meet the new Secretory Acetate“. Gimme all your money
A man was walking down a street in Washington. A man walking behind him suddenly pulled out a gun and said, "Gimme all your money, now!"
The victim said, "You can't do this to me! I'm a Congressman!"
The robber thought for a moment, then said, "In that case, gimme all of MY money!"
Customer: I've been calling...
Customer: "I've been calling 700-1000 for two days and can't get through. Can you help?"Operator: "Where did you get that number, sir?"
Customer: "It's on the door of your business."
Operator: "Sir, those are the hours that we are open."
