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Short jokes - funny one liners (13881 to 13920)Short funny jokes. These jokes are less 300 chars long, so easy to remember! These are the jokes listed 13881 to 13920. |
Numbers Equal Zero
Theorem : All numbers are equal to zero.
Proof: Suppose that a=b. Then
a = b
a^2 = ab
a^2 - b^2 = ab - b^2
(a + b)(a - b) = b(a - b)
a + b = b
a = 0
Furthermore if a + b = b, and a = b, then b + b = b, and 2b = b, which mean that 2 = 1.
#joke #short
A Hillbilly was involved in an...
A Hillbilly was involved in an accident.The Trooper asked him, "Didn't you see that yield sign when you were merging onto the highway?"
The Hillbilly replied, "Ahh sure I did...and I did it...yup, I Yieeeld and Yieeeld at that there truck and he justa kepp on comin'!!!"
#joke #short
Test
Read this question, come up with an answer and then scroll down to the bottom for the result.#joke #short
Q: What does ...
Q: What does a Disney ride and Viagra have in common?A: It takes over one hour to start and two minutes for the ride to end.
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A man is recovering from surge...
A man is recovering from surgery when the surgical nurse appears and asks him how he is feeling.Answering Machine Message 257
I am not home to talk to you,
But please don't be a creep.
Just leave your name and number,
At the sound of the...
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ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gr...
ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
WITNESS: I forget.
ATTORNEY: You forget? Can you give us an example of something you forgot?
#joke #short
The Economy is so Bad...
The Economy is so Bad...#joke #short
ATTORNEY: What gear were you ...
ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?WITNESS: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.
#joke #short
Elizabeth was surprised to rec...
Elizabeth was surprised to receive ten dollars from her Aunt for her birthday. When her Aunt asked how she was going to spend it, she replied by saying, "I'm taking it to Sunday School and giving it to God.He'll be just as surprised as I was at not getting a dollar like usual."
#joke #short
How do you get a kleenex to da...
How do you get a kleenex to dance?Â… Put a little boogey in it.
#joke #short
Various Quotes
"My fellow Americans, I've signed legislation that will outlaw Russia forever. We begin bombing in five minutes." -- Ronald Reagan, about to go on the air for a radio broadcast, unaware that the microphone was already on.#joke #short
Q: Why was th...
Q: Why was the Egyptian boy confused?A: Because his daddy was a mummy.
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ATTORNEY: Are you sexually a...
ATTORNEY: Are you sexually active?WITNESS: No, I just lie there.
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Did you hear about the red shi...
Did you hear about the red ship and the blue ship that collided?The survivors were marooned.
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Who gets the present....
The father of five children had won a toy at a raffle. He called his kids together to ask which one should have the present.
"Who is the most obedient?" he asked. "Who never talks back to Mother? Who does everything she says?"
Five small voices answered in union. "Okay, Dad. You get the toy."
Houseguest: My dear, I'll be g...
Houseguest: My dear, I'll be going away by tomorrow. Are you sad? Little girl: Oh, yes. I thought you were going to leave by today.#joke #short
The invisible couple had a kid...
The invisible couple had a kid and he isnÂ’t much to look at either!#joke #short
An A road and a B road were ha...
An A road and a B road were having a drink in a bar, when a 3ft piece of Tarmac came in.A said to B: "Keep away from him. He's mad, he's a cycle path."
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Q: What is th...
Q: What is the difference between a tribe of pygmies and a women's track team?A: The pygmies are a bunch of cunning runts.
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Walks Into a Bar... Vampires
Three vampires walk into a bar. The first one says, Ill have a pint of blood.The second one says, Ill have one, too.
The third one says, Ill have a pint of plasma.
The bartender says, So, thatll be two Bloods and a Blood Lite?
#joke #short #walksintoabar