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Short jokes - funny one liners (2521 to 2560)Short funny jokes. These jokes are less 300 chars long, so easy to remember! These are the jokes listed 2521 to 2560. |
How does trial by media usuall
How does trial by media usually work?Some Sort of Game
My wife said last night: "You treat our marriage like it's some sort of game."
Unfortunately, this cost her 12 points and a bonus chance.
if my bowels had moved
“When the hospital nurse asked me if my bowels had moved, I assured her that they had come with me as I headed to the toilet.”
Fast birthday party
My wife and I just celebrated her 32nd birthday yesterday.
It was the fastest birthday party we’ve ever had.
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If you don't get it, read it out loud ... several times if needed.
New Ticket Technology
A motorist was mailed a picture of his car speeding through an automated radar. A $40 speeding ticket was included. Being cute, he sent the police department a picture of $40. The police responded with another mailed photo-of handcuffs.
Good are you at PowerPoint?
- Boss: "How good are you at PowerPoint?"
- Me: "I Excel at it."
- Boss: "Was that a Microsoft Office pun?"
Me: "Word"
Pierced Nipple
At the bar last night, a woman got her nipple pierced right in front of me.
On a related note…
I suck at darts.
Body building Program
My wife just completed a 40 week body building program this morning.
It’s a girl and weighs 7 lbs 12 oz.
Are You Listening To Me?
I hate it when my wife says, "Are you listening to me?!"
Such a random way to start a conversation.
Wood you consider lumberjacks
Wood you consider lumberjacks to be hew man beings? It's a difficult question, but I have to axe.A Personal Trainer
I decided to quit my job as a personal trainer because I don't feel I'm fit enough for the job...
I’ve handed in my 'Too Weak' notice.
The mus
The museum is unveiling a mural of the great Stooge's most famous quotations. Make sure to visit this fantastic Moe-say-ic.
Ballerina Costumes
“Costumes are very important for a ballerina. She keeps them in her special tulle box.”
Law students to study ballet
Why is it advisable for law students to study ballet?
That way their arguments will always be on point!
The Punch Bowl
My son asked me if a punch bowl is a place where you keep names of people you want to punch...
I usually keep them in my head but, keeping them in a fancy crystal bowl seems classy.
Things Never Change
It's a sign of the time.... it's like being 16 again...
Gas is cheap and I'm grounded again!
Gun off a 3D printer
I heard that you can now print a gun off a 3D printer, but I am not impressed.
I’ve had a Canon printer for years.
Are you listening to me?!
I hate it when my wife says "Are you listening to me?!"
Such a random way to start a conversation.
