Join us on WhatsApp
Join us on Viber

Jokes of the day for Sunday, 02 December 2012

Funny jokes, funny photo and funny video collected from the internet on Sunday, 02 December 2012

Good jokes-Cover them too

Upon receiving several complaints of spellings, grammar and such other mistakes from readers in one newspaper, the editor put the following article in his editor's note:
“We are the only newspaper which is aware that other than subjects like politics, sports, celebrity gossip, business news etc, some people are particularly fond of finding faults (like puzzles) in news prints. We try and cover them too. "
#joke
Joke | Source: Really Funny Jokes - Really Funny jokes, adult jokes, Good jokes, short funny jokes, teacher jokes, affair jokes, kids jokes, doctor jokes, funny pictures
  • Currently 2.67/10

Rating: 2.7/10 (3)

Check Up

So I went to the doctor last week for a check up, and the doctor was like "you have GOT to stop masturbating!" and I was like "oh no Doc! Why?!?"

Littmann

And he said "because I'm trying to examine you!"

#joke #doctor
  • Currently 2.83/10

Rating: 2.8/10 (6)

SLIDESHOW #54 - Funny Photo Slideshow

Milk the cow...

After much urging by his wife, Uncle Joe applied for work on a farm. The foreman decided to give him a try and told him to milk a cow, equipping him with a stool and a bucket.

An hour later Uncle Joe returned dirty and sweaty, the bucket in one hand and the broken stool in the other.

"Extracting the milk was easy," he explained. "The worst part was getting the cow to sit on the stool!"

#joke
  • Currently 7.50/10

Rating: 7.5/10 (2)

Funny video of the day - how to eat a corn in 10 seconds

how to eat a corn in 10 seconds - With some tools! - link to page video is posted initially.
  • Currently 5.50/10

Rating: 5.5/10 (2)

The Smart Dog

Some rednecks were sitting around talking about how smart their dogs were.

One redneck spoke up and said, "I'll tell you what boys, I house trained my hound dog Jake when he was just a pup. When he pooped on the floor, I would stick his nose in it and throw him out the door."

"Now," he continued, "when he poops on the floor, he sticks his own nose in it and jumps out the window."

#joke
  • Currently 3.80/10

Rating: 3.8/10 (5)

Funny Photo of the day - MacBook Batman Cover - WIN

MacBook Batman Cover - WIN - Creative and cool | Source : Jokes of The Day - By Jokes of the day visitor
  • Currently 6.00/10

Rating: 6.0/10 (4)

Skunked Again

How do you stop a skunk from smelling?

You hold his nose!

#joke #short
Joke | Source: Comedy Central: Jokes - Jokes provided daily from Comedy Central's archive.
  • Currently 4.36/10

Rating: 4.4/10 (11)

Two strands of DNA were walkin...

Two strands of DNA were walking down the street. One says to the other, "Do these genes make me look fat?
#joke #short
Joke | Source: MHINTZ0929's Blog - New funny joke each day
  • Currently 2.67/10

Rating: 2.7/10 (3)

LIE DETECTOR ROBOT

Dad buys a LIE DETECTOR ROBOT which slaps people when they lie. He decides to test it at dinner.”Son, where were you today?” The son says “at school dad.” Robot slaps the son! “OK, I watched a DVD at my friends house!” “What DVD?” “Toy story.” Robot slaps the son again! “OK, it was a %&%*o”Dad yells “What! When I was your age I didn't know what %&%* was!” Robot then slaps the dad!Mom laughs “HAHAHA! He's certainly YOUR son.” Robot then slaps the mom….

#joke
Joke | Source: Joke Diary - Really Funny Jokes Daily
  • Currently 4.86/10

Rating: 4.9/10 (14)

When Chuck Norris does a pushu...

When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn't lifting himself up, he's pushing the Earth down.
#joke #short #chucknorris
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Monday, 22 August 2011
  • Currently 4.15/10

Rating: 4.1/10 (48)

There was a man walking alone ...

There was a man walking alone along a beach. He comes across a bottle with a cork in it. The man picks up the bottle and pulls out the cork. A loud roar follows and a genie appears. The genie says to the man, "I'm a little tired today and I can only give you two wishes."
The man says "That's OK, two is enough." "First, I would like one-billion dollars in a Swiss bank account."
Poof - The genie hands the man a paper and says "Here's the number to your account."
Next the man says, "Second, I would like to be irresistible to women."
Poof - the genie turned him into a box of chocolates.
#joke
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Tuesday, 10 November 2009
  • Currently 5.88/10

Rating: 5.9/10 (77)

Punishment for Missing Church

A country preacher decided to skip services one Sunday to spend the day hiking in the wilderness. Rounding a sharp bend in the trail, he collided with a bear and was sent tumbling down a steep grade. He landed on a rock and broke both legs.
With the ferocious bear charging at him from a distance, the preacher prayed, "O Lord, I'm so sorry for skipping services today. Please forgive me and grant me just one wish--make a Christian out of that bear that's coming at me!"
At that very instant, the bear skidded to a halt, fell to his knees, clasped his paws together, and began to pray aloud at the preacher's feet: "Dear God, please bless this food I am about to receive."

#joke
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Saturday, 08 August 2009
  • Currently 6.08/10

Rating: 6.1/10 (52)

Recently a teacher, a garbage ...

Recently a teacher, a garbage collector, and a lawyer wound up together at the Pearly Gates. St. Peter informed them that in order to get into Heaven, they would each have to answer one question. St. Peter addressed the teacher and asked, "What was the name of the ship that crashed into the iceberg? They just made a movie about it."
The teacher answered quickly, "That would be the Titanic." St. Peter let him through the gate. St. Peter turned to the garbage man and, figuring Heaven didn't REALLY need all the odors that this guy would bring with him, decided to make the question a little harder: "How many people died on the ship?"
Fortunately for him, the trash man had just seen the movie and answered, "about 1,500." "That's right! You may enter." St. Peter then turned to the lawyer. "Name them."
#joke #lawyer
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Wednesday, 02 December 2009
  • Currently 6.15/10

Rating: 6.2/10 (84)

Chuck Norris once shot an enem...

Chuck Norris once shot an enemy plane down with his finger, by yelling, "Bang!"
#joke #short #chucknorris
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Friday, 02 December 2011
  • Currently 2.58/10

Rating: 2.6/10 (50)

Growing Wild

Here is this guy who really takes care of his body; he lifts weights and jogs five miles every day.

One morning, he looks into the mirror and admires his body. He notices that he is really sun tanned all over except one part and he decides to do something about it.

He goes to the beach, completely undresses and buries himself in the dand except for the one part sticking out.

Two little old ladies are strolling along the beach and one looks down and says, "There really is no justice in this world."

The other little old lady says, "What do you mean?"

The first little old lady says, "Look at that."

"When I was 10 years old, I was afraid of it."

"When I was 20 years old, I was curious about it."

"When I was 30 years old, I enjoyed it."

"When I was 40 years old, I asked for it."

"When I was 50 years old, I paid for it."

"When I was 60 years old, I prayed for it."

"When I was 70 years old, I forgot about it."

"And now that I'm 80, the damned things are growing wild!!"

#joke
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Friday, 02 December 2011
  • Currently 6.53/10

Rating: 6.5/10 (38)

Better Than Botox?

Q. What's the name of a face lotion developed for Jewish women?
A. Oil of Oy Vey
- Joke shared by Beliefnet member BeliefnetSabee

#joke #short
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Wednesday, 02 December 2009
  • Currently 5.14/10

Rating: 5.1/10 (36)

Mike Birbiglia: Illiterate People

I shouldnt say bad stuff about illiterate people, though. I should write it.
#joke #short
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Friday, 02 December 2011
  • Currently 5.10/10

Rating: 5.1/10 (29)

Jokes Archive

NOTE: All jokes on this web site are property of the sites they are collected from. Web site Jokes of the day is not responsible for content of jokes. We are not trying to offend, just looking for a good laugh!! If you are offended by any of the jokes, please complain to the site jokes are coming from.
This site uses cookies to store information on your computer. Some are essential to help the site properly. Others give us insight into how the site is used and help us to optimize the user experience. See our privacy policy.