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Jokes of the day for Saturday, 23 April 2022

Funny jokes, funny photo and funny video collected from the internet on Saturday, 23 April 2022

Usually when you hear about No

Usually when you hear about Norway it's Oslo news day.
#joke #short
Joke | Source: Pun Gents - Daily Jokes, One-liners, Groaners, Puns of the day :: Puns on Demand :: Punshine Girls and Boys!
  • Currently 3.00/10

Rating: 3.0/10 (2)

Middle of a Jellyfish

What is in the middle of a jellyfish?
It's jelly button.

#joke #short
Joke | Source: A joke a day - Free Jokes of the Day Clean Funny Jokes via Email, Humor and Entertainment
  • Currently 4.25/10

Rating: 4.3/10 (4)

SLIDESHOW #25 - Funny Photo Slideshow

The birds and bees...and cows?

A man was helping one of his cows give birth, when he noticed his 4-year-old son standing wide-eyed at the fence, soaking in the whole event. The man thought, "Great...he's 4 and I'm gonna have to start explaining the birds and bees. No need to jump the gun - I'll just let him ask, and I'll answer."

After everything was over, the man walked over to his son and said, "Well son, do you have any questions?"

"Just one." gasped the still wide-eyed lad. "How fast was that calf going when he hit that cow?"

#joke
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Wednesday, 11 May 2016
  • Currently 6.44/10

Rating: 6.4/10 (9)

Thinking about the future

Q. How does a man show he's planning for the future?

A. He buys two cases of beer instead of one.

#joke #short #beer
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Wednesday, 07 January 2015
  • Currently 9.17/10

Rating: 9.2/10 (6)

Mommy Mommy 03


Mommy, Mommy! Why do I have to hop everywhere?
Shut up or I'll chop off the other leg!


Mommy, Mommy! Grandma's got a bruise.
Shut up and eat around it!


Mommy, Mommy! What happened to all your scabs?
Shut up and eat your cornflakes!


Mommy, Mommy! What's in those CARE packages they send to Africa?
Shut up and get back in the box!


Mommy, Mommy! The teacher says I look like a monkey!
Shut up and comb your face!

#joke
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Saturday, 23 April 2011
  • Currently 2.61/10

Rating: 2.6/10 (64)

Brian Posehn: Quitting Meat

Quitting pot? It was actually easier for me to become a vegetarian -- you know, quitting meat -- because your friends never show up at your house with a sack of meat.
#joke #short
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Saturday, 23 April 2011
  • Currently 3.76/10

Rating: 3.8/10 (55)

Miracle whip

Q: What do you call a ninety year old man who can still masturbate?

A: Miracle Whip.

Submitted by Curtis

Edited by Glaci

#joke #short
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Saturday, 23 April 2011
  • Currently 3.87/10

Rating: 3.9/10 (53)

A Special Night in Iowa

Q: What do you call a bunch of tractors parked in front of a McDonald's on Friday night in Iowa?
A: Prom.

#joke #short #friday
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Tuesday, 23 April 2013
  • Currently 4.85/10

Rating: 4.9/10 (40)

Subway Party

Two small-town merchants were visiting New York City for the first time to attend a conference.

There was a large party thrown, with lots of food and drink. At the end of the party, they both staggered outside.

One guy crossed the street, while the other stumbled into a subway entrance.

When the 1st guy reached the other side of the street, he noticed the other emerging from the subway stairs.

"Where ya been?"

he slurred.

"I don't know," gushed the other guy, "but you should see the train set that guy has in his basement!"

#joke
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Monday, 23 April 2012
  • Currently 5.75/10

Rating: 5.8/10 (40)

Greg Behrendt: Halloween Rules

I have two rules when you come to my house on Halloween. Wear a costume -- cause if youve manned your door at your own house, you know how many kids will roll up, 14 years old with no costume and an attitude. My other rule: dont grab. Let me assess you and then design a candy situation for you.
#joke #short #halloween
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Monday, 31 October 2011
  • Currently 4.50/10

Rating: 4.5/10 (12)

The Emulation

A preacher on his deathbed summoned his doctor and his lawyer. They came, and he asked them to sit on either side of his bed and hold his hands.
They sat thus for a long while until the doctor stirred and said, ”You don’t have long on this earth, Reverend. Better tell us why you asked us to come.”
The old preacher stirred himself wheezed and said ”Well, Jesus died between two thieves, and that’s the way I want to go too.”

#joke #doctor #lawyer
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Thursday, 24 May 2018
  • Currently 8.47/10

Rating: 8.5/10 (15)

A pastor was opening his mail...

A pastor was opening his mail one morning and one envelope had only a single sheet of paper with a single word printed on it: “FOOL!” The following Sunday the priest announced, “I have known many people who have written letters and forgotten to sign their name. But this week I received a letter from someone who signed his name and had forgotten to write a letter.”
#joke
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Tuesday, 04 April 2017
  • Currently 7.70/10

Rating: 7.7/10 (10)

International Guide Dog Day joke

April 26th is International Guide Dog Day! Celebrate it with a joke:

Blind man walks into a store
He grabs his guide dog by the tail and lifts it into the air then spins it around his head.
The store clerk, alarmed by this strange behavior said , "can I help you?"
…. "Nope, I'm just looking around."

#GuideDogDay #InternationalGuideDogDay

#joke
Joke | Source: Jokes of The Day - By Jokes of the day visitor
  • Currently 6.50/10

Rating: 6.5/10 (4)

Rules

A couple were married and, following the wedding, the husband laid down some rules.
"I'll be home when I want, if I want, and at what time I want," he insisted. "And, I don't expect any hassle from you. Also, I expect a decent meal to be on the table every evening, unless I tell you otherwise. I'll go hunting, fishing, boozing, and card-playing with my buddies whenever I want. Those are my rules," he said. "Any comments?"
His new bride replied, "No, that's fine with me. But, just understand that there'll be sex here at seven o'clock every night ... whether you're here or not."
#joke
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Tuesday, 06 July 2010
  • Currently 7.38/10

Rating: 7.4/10 (16)

April Fool's Day - Here are 5 pranks you can play on people

1. Add food coloring to milk that comes in a cardboard container.
2. Add food coloring to the windshield washer fluid of someone’s car.
3. Switch around random keys on someone’s keyboard who isn’t a very good typist.
4. Switch the Push and Pull signs on a set of doors.
5. Hide food in a trash can and when someone comes by grab some and eat it.
#joke #aprilfoolsday #prank
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Saturday, 06 December 2014
  • Currently 7.50/10

Rating: 7.5/10 (2)

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