Popular jokes (10816 to 10830)Jokes sorted by popularity on social networks. Popularity is sum of all all comments, likes, pluses, tweets, etc. is new measure, independant from rating with our star rating system. |
If It Ain't Broke, Don't Fix It
Most people will say, "If it ain't broke, don't fix it."
An engineer will say, "If it ain't broke, it doesn't have enough features yet."
Knock Knock Collection 168
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Spock!
Spock who?
Spock louder!
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Stacey!
Stacey who?
Stacey'ted until the bus stops!
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Stalin!
Stalin who?
Stalin for time!
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Stan!
Stan who?
Stan back or I'll shoot!
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Stanton!
Stanton who?
Stanton here answering questions is no fun!
Chuck Norris doesn't worry abo...
Chuck Norris doesn't worry about changing his clock twice a year for daylight savings time. The sun rises and sets when Chuck tells it to.
A broom wedding...
Two brooms were hanging in the closet, and after they got to know each other a bit, decided to get married.
The bride broom looked very beautiful in her white dress. The groom broom was handsome and suave in his tuxedo. The wedding was lovely and attended by all the push brooms and dust mops.
After the wedding, at the wedding dinner, the bride broom leaned over and whispered to the groom broom, "We're soon going to have a little whisk broom!"
"Impossible!" said the groom broom, indignantly. "We haven't even swept together yet!!!"
The Joys of Basic Training
My MTI (Military Training Instructor) once told me that I was outstanding...
I thanked him...
He then said that I was out standing in the sun too long and it affected my brain.
Milking The Cow
A farmer was milking his cow. He was just starting to get a good rhythm going when a bug flew into the barn and started circling his head.
Suddenly, the bug flew into the cow's ear. The farmer didn't think much about it until the bug squirted out into his bucket.
It went in one ear and out the udder.
Q: What did 50 cent say to his...
Q: What did 50 cent say to his grandmother who gave him a sweater she had made him?A: G-U-NIT
Wrong bus
A drunk man gets on the bus late one night, staggers up the aisle, and sits next to an elderly woman.
She looks the man up and down and says: "I've got news for you. You're going straight to hell!"
The man jumps up out of his seat and shouts: "Man, I'm on the wrong bus!"
Death and Taxes
Death and taxes are inevitable...
But at least death doesn't get worse every year!
Why is it called a 'Picnic'?
Why is it called a 'Picnic'?Betty Sue wanted to eat outside on a hot summer day with her boyfriend. Problem: she had two boyfriends, Fred and Nick. Considering she knew she wouldn't have a very happy lunch if the two boys were arguing, she decided just to choose one boy to have the meal.
She Picked Nick.
