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Short jokes - funny one liners (5361 to 5400)

Short jokes - funny one liners (5361 to 5400)

Short funny jokes. These jokes are less 300 chars long, so easy to remember! These are the jokes listed 5361 to 5400.

“I went to my doctor

“I went to my doctor and told the receptionist that I felt like a deck of cards. She said, 'Have a seat, and the doctor will deal with you when he can.'”

Joke | Source: Jokes of the Day - Funny puns and jokes - the largest collection of humorous jokes on the internet. New pun added daily.
  • Currently 1.80/10

Rating: 1.8/10 (5)

“He knew his lot in l

“He knew his lot in life was to create the world's greatest mosquito repellant. He had a deet with destiny.”

#joke #short #animal #mosquito
Joke | Source: Jokes of the Day - Funny puns and jokes - the largest collection of humorous jokes on the internet. New pun added daily.
  • Currently 2.00/10

Rating: 2.0/10 (4)

SLIDESHOW #79 - Funny Photo Slideshow

“The successive presi

“The successive president of the local Climate Changes Committee was the carbon copy of his predecessor.”

#joke #short
Joke | Source: Jokes of the Day - Funny puns and jokes - the largest collection of humorous jokes on the internet. New pun added daily.
  • Currently 5.00/10

Rating: 5.0/10 (1)

The ancient Greek phal

The ancient Greek phallus o' furs never shaved.
#joke #short
Joke | Source: Pun Gents - Daily Jokes, One-liners, Groaners, Puns of the day :: Puns on Demand :: Punshine Girls and Boys!
  • Currently 2.00/10

Rating: 2.0/10 (4)

“I have a bad, bad pa

“I have a bad, bad pain in my toe, no gout about it.”

#joke #short
Joke | Source: Jokes of the Day - Funny puns and jokes - the largest collection of humorous jokes on the internet. New pun added daily.
  • Currently 2.63/10

Rating: 2.6/10 (8)

 Preventive Medicine Belief


Mary: My daughter believes in preventative medicine, doctor.
Doctor: Oh, really?
Mary: Yes, she tries to prevent me from making her take it!

Joke | Source: Joke of the Day - Jokes served hot and fresh daily.
  • Currently 6.27/10

Rating: 6.3/10 (11)

What does an archer send his e

What does an archer send his ex-lover on Valentine's Day? A: Arrows.
#joke #short
Joke | Source: Pun Gents - Daily Jokes, One-liners, Groaners, Puns of the day :: Puns on Demand :: Punshine Girls and Boys!
  • Currently 1.57/10

Rating: 1.6/10 (7)

“The Balloon family n

“The Balloon family name died off when it ran out of heir.”

#joke #short
Joke | Source: Jokes of the Day - Funny puns and jokes - the largest collection of humorous jokes on the internet. New pun added daily.
  • Currently 6.50/10

Rating: 6.5/10 (4)

In Russia and Ukraine, it̵

In Russia and Ukraine, it's easy to find wifey hotspots.
#joke #short
Joke | Source: Pun Gents - Daily Jokes, One-liners, Groaners, Puns of the day :: Puns on Demand :: Punshine Girls and Boys!
  • Currently 4.88/10

Rating: 4.9/10 (8)

“Some undercover oper

“Some undercover operatives are given blanket approvals!”

#joke #short
Joke | Source: Jokes of the Day - Funny puns and jokes - the largest collection of humorous jokes on the internet. New pun added daily.
  • Currently 7.50/10

Rating: 7.5/10 (2)

If I show anyone my cuckoo clo

If I show anyone my cuckoo clock, I'll be a laughing's tock.
#joke #short
Joke | Source: Pun Gents - Daily Jokes, One-liners, Groaners, Puns of the day :: Puns on Demand :: Punshine Girls and Boys!
  • Currently 4.25/10

Rating: 4.3/10 (4)

“My friend quit worki

“My friend quit working at the pin factory. He felt there was no point to the job.”

#joke #short
Joke | Source: Jokes of the Day - Funny puns and jokes - the largest collection of humorous jokes on the internet. New pun added daily.
  • Currently 4.25/10

Rating: 4.3/10 (4)

If someone asks ‘

If someone asks ‘What's ursine?' Just point to the bearometer.
#joke #short
Joke | Source: Pun Gents - Daily Jokes, One-liners, Groaners, Puns of the day :: Puns on Demand :: Punshine Girls and Boys!
  • Currently 3.17/10

Rating: 3.2/10 (6)

“I had a job at the b

“I had a job at the bowling alley. Not for long though, I was only tenpin.”

#joke #short
Joke | Source: Jokes of the Day - Funny puns and jokes - the largest collection of humorous jokes on the internet. New pun added daily.
  • Currently 2.00/10

Rating: 2.0/10 (4)

Where are the worst hotels?

Where are the worst hotels?
- Texas, the lone star state.
#joke #short
Joke | Source: Pun Gents - Daily Jokes, One-liners, Groaners, Puns of the day :: Puns on Demand :: Punshine Girls and Boys!
  • Currently 7.44/10

Rating: 7.4/10 (9)

Septic tank cleaner's fa

Septic tank cleaner's favourite video game? Cull of Doody.
#joke #short
Joke | Source: Pun Gents - Daily Jokes, One-liners, Groaners, Puns of the day :: Puns on Demand :: Punshine Girls and Boys!
  • Currently 5.00/10

Rating: 5.0/10 (1)

How old is a flower? I canR

How old is a flower? I can't tell. Is it adult orchid?
#joke #short
Joke | Source: Pun Gents - Daily Jokes, One-liners, Groaners, Puns of the day :: Puns on Demand :: Punshine Girls and Boys!
  • Currently 3.60/10

Rating: 3.6/10 (5)

“Why are you enjoying

“Why are you enjoying life while eating hotdogs? Because you're relishing the moment.”

#joke #short #food #eating
Joke | Source: Jokes of the Day - Funny puns and jokes - the largest collection of humorous jokes on the internet. New pun added daily.
  • Currently 2.33/10

Rating: 2.3/10 (3)

How does the Syrian president

How does the Syrian president live with himself? He must look in the mirror and say  'I'm Assad fellow. But everything's gonna be Alawite.'
#joke #short
Joke | Source: Pun Gents - Daily Jokes, One-liners, Groaners, Puns of the day :: Puns on Demand :: Punshine Girls and Boys!
  • Currently 5.33/10

Rating: 5.3/10 (3)

I think there are ab...

“I think there are about 1-2 million baseball fields in the world, but that's just a ballpark number.”

#joke #short #sport #baseball
Joke | Source: Jokes of the Day - Funny puns and jokes - the largest collection of humorous jokes on the internet. New pun added daily.
  • Currently 8.25/10

Rating: 8.3/10 (8)

Lost in the supermarket

The man approached the very beautiful woman in the large supermarket and asked, "You know, I've lost my wife here in the supermarket. Can you talk to me for a couple of minutes?"

"Why?"

"Because every time I talk to a a beautiful woman my wife appears out of nowhere."

#joke #short
Joke | Source: Jokes - Used to be - Pacific products joke of the day, but site no longer works.
  • Currently 9.39/10

Rating: 9.4/10 (23)

I borrowed from the bank to st

I borrowed from the bank to start my apiary. Now I have a horrendous bee owe problem.
#joke #short #animal #bee
Joke | Source: Pun Gents - Daily Jokes, One-liners, Groaners, Puns of the day :: Puns on Demand :: Punshine Girls and Boys!
  • Currently 2.00/10

Rating: 2.0/10 (4)

“What kind of pumpkin

“What kind of pumpkin protects castles? A royal gourd!”

#joke #short
Joke | Source: Jokes of the Day - Funny puns and jokes - the largest collection of humorous jokes on the internet. New pun added daily.
  • Currently 6.80/10

Rating: 6.8/10 (10)

Scientology on Demand: aka

Scientology on Demand: aka Dianetflix. It's a streaming of consciousness.
#joke #short
Joke | Source: Pun Gents - Daily Jokes, One-liners, Groaners, Puns of the day :: Puns on Demand :: Punshine Girls and Boys!
  • Currently 2.86/10

Rating: 2.9/10 (7)

“I was into this dude

“I was into this dude named Berry but it turned out he wasn't ripe for me.”

#joke #short
Joke | Source: Jokes of the Day - Funny puns and jokes - the largest collection of humorous jokes on the internet. New pun added daily.
  • Currently 6.00/10

Rating: 6.0/10 (8)

Patient: Doctor, I have a litt

Patient: Doctor, I have a little man in my head, and he's cursing all the time!
Doctor: Well, this problem is really easy to fix! It will cost you $1000.
Patient: Doctor, do you know what the little guy just said?
Joke | Source: Smilezilla - Daily Jokes and Funny Stories
  • Currently 5.77/10

Rating: 5.8/10 (31)

Irritated with everything

Irritated with everything: Have you ever been in one of those moods where you don't really know what's wrong but you feel irritated with everyone and everything?
#joke #short
Joke | Source: Minion Quotes - Despicable Me Minions is a website dedicated to minions. Have a good time reading minion quotes, funny quotes or entertain yourself playing minion games. Sajt vise ne radi
  • Currently 5.44/10

Rating: 5.4/10 (9)

I had a communist lover. She l

I had a communist lover. She left Marx all over my body. They're only visible from certain Engels.
#joke #short
Joke | Source: Pun Gents - Daily Jokes, One-liners, Groaners, Puns of the day :: Puns on Demand :: Punshine Girls and Boys!
  • Currently 4.88/10

Rating: 4.9/10 (8)

“How do you get yarn

“How do you get yarn out of a snake? Wait until it sheds its skein.”

#joke #short #animal #snake
Joke | Source: Jokes of the Day - Funny puns and jokes - the largest collection of humorous jokes on the internet. New pun added daily.
  • Currently 3.60/10

Rating: 3.6/10 (5)

The Founding Fathers believed

The Founding Fathers believed America was destined for greatness in fumigation. They termed it ‘Man o Pest Destiny‘
Joke | Source: Pun Gents - Daily Jokes, One-liners, Groaners, Puns of the day :: Puns on Demand :: Punshine Girls and Boys!
  • Currently 5.33/10

Rating: 5.3/10 (3)

Like father like son

Joey's teacher sent a note home to his Mother saying, "Joey seems to be a very bright boy, but spends too much of his time thinking about sex and girls."

The Mother wrote back the next day, "If you find a solution, please advise. I have the same problem with his Father."

Joke | Source: Jokes - Used to be - Pacific products joke of the day, but site no longer works.
  • Currently 7.73/10

Rating: 7.7/10 (22)

Want to marry a river horse? I

Want to marry a river horse? I won't hippos you. Or a horned ungulate? Sure, love has neither rhino reason.
#joke #short #animal #horse
Joke | Source: Pun Gents - Daily Jokes, One-liners, Groaners, Puns of the day :: Puns on Demand :: Punshine Girls and Boys!
  • Currently 5.33/10

Rating: 5.3/10 (3)

Who was always rushing around

Who was always rushing around the kiln? Harry Potter.
#joke #short
Joke | Source: Pun Gents - Daily Jokes, One-liners, Groaners, Puns of the day :: Puns on Demand :: Punshine Girls and Boys!
  • Currently 3.17/10

Rating: 3.2/10 (6)

Guys who drive in re...

“Guys who drive in retractable convertibles with remote control often hoodwink others!”

#joke #short
Joke | Source: Jokes of the Day - Funny puns and jokes - the largest collection of humorous jokes on the internet. New pun added daily.
  • Currently 6.00/10

Rating: 6.0/10 (8)

Dear Pun Gents

Dear Pun Gents, I need a name for a team of business faculty working in a group to promote and manage a business degree program. ~Greg, Salina
#joke #short
Joke | Source: Pun Gents - Daily Jokes, One-liners, Groaners, Puns of the day :: Puns on Demand :: Punshine Girls and Boys!
  • Currently 2.00/10

Rating: 2.0/10 (4)

Groups of animals should be se

Groups of animals should be seen and not herd.
Joke | Source: Pun Gents - Daily Jokes, One-liners, Groaners, Puns of the day :: Puns on Demand :: Punshine Girls and Boys!
  • Currently 6.50/10

Rating: 6.5/10 (4)

“Two carnivores eat s

“Two carnivores eat steak when they meat.”

#joke #short #food #meat #steak
Joke | Source: Jokes of the Day - Funny puns and jokes - the largest collection of humorous jokes on the internet. New pun added daily.
  • Currently 6.50/10

Rating: 6.5/10 (4)

Whom should i marry? Marry the one who…

Whom should i marry? Marry the one who…
#joke #short
Joke | Source: Minion Quotes - Despicable Me Minions is a website dedicated to minions. Have a good time reading minion quotes, funny quotes or entertain yourself playing minion games. Sajt vise ne radi
  • Currently 6.17/10

Rating: 6.2/10 (6)

The Karate Kid came up with an

The Karate Kid came up with an elaborate plan to obtain large quantities of tender beef. He was very Macchio Vealian that way.
#joke #short #food #beef #sport #karate
Joke | Source: Pun Gents - Daily Jokes, One-liners, Groaners, Puns of the day :: Puns on Demand :: Punshine Girls and Boys!
  • Currently 2.86/10

Rating: 2.9/10 (7)

“A few boxers were st

“A few boxers were standing in a line. That's the punch line!”

#joke #short #sport #boxer
Joke | Source: Jokes of the Day - Funny puns and jokes - the largest collection of humorous jokes on the internet. New pun added daily.
  • Currently 5.33/10

Rating: 5.3/10 (3)

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