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Short jokes - funny one liners (841 to 880)Short funny jokes. These jokes are less 300 chars long, so easy to remember! These are the jokes listed 841 to 880. |
Look at Superman's abs.
Look at Superman's abs. The guy is krypt.
The corn farmer was so cheap.
The corn farmer was so cheap. Everyone called him a maizer.Why did the flower seller expa
Why did the flower seller expand his shop?If you get nostalgic about chi
If you get nostalgic about childhood camping trips you are just living in the past tents.Downed 22 Russian Fighter Jets
My brother just broke the record by downing 22 Russian jets in Ukraine...
He'll forever be remembered as the worst mechanic in the Russian Air Force!
Today marks the first time we
Today marks the first time we ever May Day pun.Someone Just Called
Someone just called my phone, sneezed and then hung up.
I’m getting sick and tired of these cold calls.
Did You See the Joke?
Did anyone see the joke I posted recently about my spine?
It was about a weak back.
Just Like Family
Saw a sign at a store that said, "We treat you like family."
I'm not going in there.
No Life Insurance for Grandpa
"Grandpa, why don't you have any life insurance?"
"So you can all be really sad when I die."
Graverobbers get up to a lot o
Graverobbers get up to a lot of skulldiggery.It's Not A Stretch
As I get older, I notice that my wife and my hamstrings have a lot in common.
They're both inflexible.
Those who split the atom were
Those who split the atom were true divisionaries.Did the world end? Oops…
Did the world end? Oops… never Mayan!Don't ask us to make pun
Don't ask us to make puns about voyeurism. It's not our perv view.Goodbye Disney
As my family was leaving Disney World, my daughter waved and said, "Goodbye Minnie!"
My son waved and said, "Goodbye Mickey!"
I waved and said, "Goodbye money!"
A tire salesman must have an i
A tire salesman must have an inflated sense of self worth, and be willing to live a pneumatic life.
Close Shave
My neighbor shaves 15-20 times a day...
No, he's not crazy... he's just a barber.
Pigeons can't make up th
Pigeons can't make up their minds. They're always shitting on the fence!
Do pirates get their J
Do pirates get their Jollies by Rogering?The boat maker was taken hosta
The boat maker was taken hostage, and held for transom.Jimmy the Insomniac
My cousin Jimmy was having a terrible time falling asleep unless he was lying on a pile of old magazines.
It turns out he had back issues.
The One Big Halloween Scare
I told my wife that there is only one thing that scares me on Halloween.
My wife: Which is?
Me: Exactly!
Do Pat and Rhain ever hang out
Do Pat and Rhain ever hang out in Starbucks?Italian Cologne?
Currently wearing some old spice...
It was oregano, I found it in the pantry.
I Wish I Could Be You
I met a genie once. He gave me one wish.
I said, “I wish I could be you.”
The genue saud, "Weurd wush, but U wull grant ut."
Haunted trees
The trees are haunted in Eritrea.I gave up my jazz career to ma
I gave up my jazz career to marry a cosmetic surgeon. Now I play the sacks o fun.Born On the Highway
I told my brother he was born on the highway.
After all, that’s where most accidents happen.
