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Short jokes - funny one liners (13721 to 13760)Short funny jokes. These jokes are less 300 chars long, so easy to remember! These are the jokes listed 13721 to 13760. |
What's brown and sounds like a...
What's brown and sounds like a bell?DUNG
#joke #short
A Recently Spotted Bumper Sticker:
"I believe in dragons, good men and other fantasy creatures."
#joke #short
Obviously Nuts
A guy goes to the psychiatrist only wearing shorts made of Glad wrap.The psychiatrist says, Well, I can clearly see youre nuts.
#joke #short
Where do cows go on a Saturday...
Where do cows go on a Saturday night?How Do You Unlock A Door?
John and Jill were about to go into his apartment and before he could open his door, Jill said, "Wait a minute, I can tell how a man makes love by how he unlocks his door."#joke #short
What do you call a lady with o...
What do you call a lady with one leg?Eileen.
#joke #short
Ecumenical Greenbacks
My home church welcomes all denominations, but really prefers tens and twenties.
#joke #short
A Crazy Person in the Woods
Q: How does a crazy person travel through the woods?A: They take the psycho path.
#joke #short
How do sailors get their cloth...
How do sailors get their clothes clean?They throw them overboard and then they are washed ashore
#joke #short
Poor kids
Two poor kids were invited by a rich kid to a swimming party at his pool.When they were changing into their swim trunks, one turned to the other and said: "Did you notice the small dongs on the rich kids?"
The other answered: "Yeah! It's probably because they have toys to play with!"
I married Mr Right. . .
I married Mr Right. . .
But I didn't realise his first name was Always.
#joke #short
The four stages of life....
1. You believe in Santa Claus2. You don't believe in Santa Claus
3. You are Santa Claus
4. You look like Santa Claus
#joke #short
Wife: Where do you want to go ...
Wife: Where do you want to go on holiday this year?Husband: Somewhere I've never been before.
Wife: How about the Kitchen?
#joke #short
Deep Thought: Ambition is a po...
Deep Thought: Ambition is a poor excuse for not having sense enough to be lazy.#joke #short
My kids love going to the...
My kids love going to the Web, and they keep track of their passwords by writing them on Post-it notes.I noticed their Disney password was "MickeyMinnieGoofyPluto," and asked why it was so long.
"Because," my son explained, "they say it has to have at least four characters."
#joke #short
Yo momma so ugly she looked ou...
Yo momma so ugly she looked out the window and got arrested for mooning.#joke #short
A duck walks into a drugstore ...
A duck walks into a drugstore and says to the Pharmacist "gee, can you help me out. I need to buy some prophylactics but I forgot my wallet."The Pharmacist replies "no problem, I'll just put them on your bill."
The Duck responds "gee Doc, that is not the way I planned to use them!"
#joke #short
What do you call a crate of du...
What do you call a crate of ducks ?A box of quackers !
#joke #short
An Englishman, an Irishman and...
An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar and the bartender says, "Is this some kind of joke?"#joke #short
What do you get when you cross...
What do you get when you cross a galaxy with a toad?Star Warts!
#joke #short
Aussies: Believe you should lo...
Aussies: Believe you should look out for your mates.Brits: Believe that you should look out for those people who belong to your club.
Americans: Believe that people should look out for and take care of themselves.
Canadians: Believe that that is the government's job.
#joke #short
Why did the first monkey fall ...
Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree?Because it died.
Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree?
Because it was holding hands with the first monkey
why did the third monkey fall out of the tree?
because it thought they were playing a game!
Barbie
A man walks into the toy store to get a Barbie doll for his daughter. So he asks the assistant, as you would, "How much is Barbie?"#joke #short
What happened when the shopper...
What happened when the shopper left her vegetables in the library?It was a turnip for the books
#joke #short
An Englishman, an Irishman and...
An Englishman, an Irishman and an Australian walk into a bar.The barman says, "Is this some kind of bloody joke?"
#joke #short
Laws
1. Law of Mechanical Repair - After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch and you'll have to pee..#joke #short
Q: Why do wom...
Q: Why do women have orgasms during sex?A: They always need something to moan about.
#joke #short
Siamese Twins
Q: Why did the Siamese twins move to England?A: So the other one could drive.
#joke #short
