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Short jokes - funny one liners (14601 to 14640)Short funny jokes. These jokes are less 300 chars long, so easy to remember! These are the jokes listed 14601 to 14640. |
A Multiple Hot Foot
Did you hear about the shoe factory that burnt down?Two hundred soles were lost.
One day a camel and an elephan...
One day a camel and an elephant met.The elephant asked the camel "Why do you have your breasts on your back?"
The camel clearly irritated by the outrage of modesty replied "What a stupid question from someone who has a dick on his face"
Phone service...
Classmates at college were lamenting the cost of long distance phone service and debating the relative advantages of AT&T, MCI, and Sprint.
"I've found CTC to be the cheapest plan around," offered one.
"CTC? Who are they?"
"You know," he responded. "Call Them Collect."
How do men sort their laundry?...
How do men sort their laundry? "Filthy" and "Filthy but Wearable."Dragging Their Feet
Two men are approaching each other on a sidewalk. Both are dragging their right foot as they walk.As they meet, one man looks at the other knowingly, points to his foot and says, Vietnam, 1969."
The other points his thumb behind him and says, "Dog crap, 20 feet back."
How can you tell when a politi...
How can you tell when a politician is lying to you? His lips move.How do you make a bandstand?
How do you make a bandstand?
Beyond the Call of Duty
"Give me a sentence about a public servant," said the teacher.
The small boy wrote: "The fireman came down the ladder pregnant."
The teacher took the lad aside to correct him. "Don't you know what pregnant means?" she asked.
"Sure," said the young boy, confidently. "Means carrying a child."
A Recently Spotted Bumper Sticker:
"Be ye fishers of men -- you catch them and He'll clean them."
q: What do you get when you c...
q: What do you get when you cross an impressionist painter with a New York City cab driver?A: You get Vincent Van Go Fuck Yourself.
Our Stupid Apartment
Two blondes realize that their apartment is on fire and go out onto the balcony."Help, help!" yells one of the blondes.
"Help us, help us!" yells the other.
"Maybe it would help if we yelled together," said the first blonde.
"Good idea," said the other.
"Together, together!"
Q: What do Eskimos get from si...
Q: What do Eskimos get from sitting on the ice too long?Making Improvements
“Grandpa, did God make you?â€
“Yes.â€
“Did he make me?â€
“Yes.â€
“I guess He’s doing better work now.â€
Our local drugstore was robbed of 500 bottles...
Our local drugstore was robbed of 500 bottles of Viagra.The suspect is known to be a hardened criminal!
A Recently Spotted Bumper Sticker:
"When the Church ruled the World it was called the Dark Ages."
Glazed Over
A cop pulls over a guy."Your eyes are awfully red. Have you been drinking?"
"Gee, officer," the man says. "Your eyes are awfully glazed -- have you been eating doughnuts?"
Did you hear about the $6 mil...
Did you hear about the $6 million lottery? The winner gets $6 a year for a million years.What did the neurotic pig say ...
What did the neurotic pig say to the farmer?A woman's perogative...
Little Mary was at her first wedding and gaped at the entire ceremony.
When it was over, she asked her mother, "Why did the lady change her mind?"
Her mother replied, "What do you mean?"
"Well, she went down the aisle with one man, and came back with another one."
A Walking Economy
This guy is walking with his friend, who happens to be a psychologist. He says to this friend, "I'm a walking economy."
The friend asks, "How so?"
"My hair line is in recession, my stomach is a victim of inflation, and both of these together are putting me into a deep depression!"
Why was the computer so tired ...
Why was the computer so tired when it got home?The Christmas gift...
A guy bought his wife a beautiful diamond ring for Christmas.
A friend of his said, "I thought she wanted one of those sporty 4-Wheel drive vehicles."
"She did," he replied. "But where in the world was I gonna find a fake Jeep?"
Poor kids
Two poor kids were invited by a rich kid to a swimming party at his pool.When they were changing into their swim trunks, one turned to the other and said: "Did you notice the small dongs on the rich kids?"
The other answered: "Yeah! It's probably because they have toys to play with!"
Why should politicians be buri...
Why should politicians be buried 100 feet underground? Because deep down they're really good people.Nude Beach
"How can you tell if there is a blind man on a nude beach?" a guy asked his friend."It ain't hard," he said with a shrug.
Submitted by curtis
Edited by calamjo, Tantilazing, yisman and hottrouble1
