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Short jokes - funny one liners (15001 to 15040)Short funny jokes. These jokes are less 300 chars long, so easy to remember! These are the jokes listed 15001 to 15040. |
Diplomacy is the art of lettin...
Diplomacy is the art of letting someone have your way.#joke #short
Answering Machine Message 131
I can't answer the phone now because I'm over at Slobinskis's house. Me and five other guys are helping him replace a lightbulb.
#joke #short
My friends and I are all crazy...
My friends and I are all crazy. That's the only thing that keeps us sane.#joke #short
A crab goes to a disco with hi...
A crab goes to a disco with his mate.After dancing a while the crab turns to his mate and says, "I'm off". "Why?" asks his mate. "I've just pulled a mussel," says the crab, "and we're off to my plaice."
#joke #short
hooters has opened a casino in...
hooters has opened a casino in Las Vegas. This is one casino where gamblers don't mind going for bust.#joke #short
My friends and I are all crazy...
My friends and I are all crazy. That's the only thing that keeps us sane.#joke #short
A crab goes to a disco with hi...
A crab goes to a disco with his mate.After dancing a while the crab turns to his mate and says, "I'm off". "Why?" asks his mate. "I've just pulled a mussel," says the crab, "and we're off to my plaice."
#joke #short
Amish carriage....
While driving in Pennsylvania, a family caught up to an Amish carriage.
The owner of the carriage obviously had a sense of humor because attached to the back of the carriage was a hand-painted sign that read, "Energy efficient vehicle. Runs on oats and grass. CAUTION: Do not step on exhaust."
#joke #short
I think my wife is leading a d...
I think my wife is leading a double life -- hers and mine.#joke #short
What do vampires do at 11am ev...
What do vampires do at 11am every day?an elderly lady went to a meet...
an elderly lady went to a meeting of her bridge club and during the conversations, told her colleagues that she had found a lump in her left breast two days before."But," she said, "I am delighted that I learned it was my belt buckle!"
#joke #short
I think my wife is leading a d...
I think my wife is leading a double life -- hers and mine.#joke #short
What do vampires do at 11am ev...
What do vampires do at 11am every day?I met this gal in a bar, and o...
I met this gal in a bar, and one thing lead to another... I said, "Let's go back to my place."She said, "Oh, do you have cable?"
I said, "No, but I have some old ropes that should hold just fine..."
#joke #short
an elderly lady went to a meet...
an elderly lady went to a meeting of her bridge club and during the conversations, told her colleagues that she had found a lump in her left breast two days before."But," she said, "I am delighted that I learned it was my belt buckle!"
#joke #short
Brain transplant
"How can I ever thank you?" gushed a woman to Clarence Darrow, after he had solved her legal troubles."My dear woman," Darrow replied, "ever since the Phoenicians invented money there has been only one answer to that question."
#joke #short
I don't use my conscience as m...
I don't use my conscience as my guide ... it's more of a creative consultant.#joke #short
A Lewisman, planning a trip to...
A Lewisman, planning a trip to Edinburgh, telephoned the airline to ask how long the flight from Stornoway took."Just one second, sir," said the lady at the other end. "Thanks very much," the man said, and hung up.
#joke #short
he other day I overheard a con...
he other day I overheard a conversation between two Gen-X'ers in the mall.One said, "Ya know, there's so much permissiveness these days, I guess the only way to avoid sex at all is to get married."
#joke #short
Holes in pockets
Why did the bald man cut holes in his pockets?So he could run his fingers through his hair.
Submitted by Calamjo
Edited by Curtis
#joke #short
Definition of "committee": A b...
Definition of "committee": A body that keeps minutes and wastes hours.#joke #short
Where did you go for your holi...
Where did you go for your holidays?adies: Which of the following...
adies: Which of the following will do a better job of frightening a man away?"Get away or I'll call the police!"
or
"I love you and want to marry you and have your children."
#joke #short #policeman
Yo Momma so ugly!
Yo Momma so ugly, when she stands in front of the mirror the reflection won't look at her!#joke #short
Why do people with closed mind...
Why do people with closed minds always open their mouths?#joke #short
A man refused a drink in pub w...
A man refused a drink in pub was told it was because of the trouble he caused the night before.adies: Which of the following...
adies: Which of the following will do a better job of frightening a man away?"Get away or I'll call the police!"
or
"I love you and want to marry you and have your children."
#joke #short #policeman
What do you call a four-foot-t...
What do you call a four-foot-tall psychic that escaped from jail? A small medium at large!#joke #short
A man refused a drink in pub w...
A man refused a drink in pub was told it was because of the trouble he caused the night before.A man refused a drink in pub w...
A man refused a drink in pub was told it was because of the trouble he caused the night before.sister
May a weird customs inspector discover a secret compartment in your sister.-- Johnny Carson
#joke #short
The younger we are, the more w...
The younger we are, the more we want to change the world. The older we are, the more we want to change the young.#joke #short
