Short jokes - funny one liners (1721 to 1760)

Do bored mountaineers embrace

Sodium Hypobromite

Science teacher: "Does anyone here know what sodium hypobromite is?"
Student: "NaBrO!"

The animals that most enjoy ha

The study of farts, aka ron

You Must Be Single

A man is buying a banana, an apple and two eggs. The cashier says: "You must be single?”
The man replied: “Wow how did you know that?”
Cashier: “Because you’re not that good looking.”

You can't win a fight wi

Do Eskimos believe in

Under the Motel Bed

Because of back problems, each night I lie on the floor and do exercises.
Once when we stopped at a motel, as I started my exercise, something under the bed caught my eye.
It was a card. On it was written, "Yes, we do clean under here, too."

Tolkien your language
Tolkien your language

#joke #short

The Good Thief

Why didn't the man report his stolen credit card?
The thief was spending less than his wife.

The gho

The noisiest body of water is

What I Love About Baseball

Do you know what I love most about baseball?
The pine tar, the resin, the grass, the dirt...
And that's just in the hot dogs!

Which popstar makes rapid onst

Doing the Bare Minimum

As a kid, I got lectured for only doing the bare minimum to complete a task.
As an engineer, I get paid to do just that.

I'm bed

The Fortune Cookies

After finishing our Chinese food, my husband and I cracked open our fortune cookies.
Mine read, “Be quiet for a little while.”
His read, “Talk while you have a chance.”

Can a mathematician marry his

Keep Get Well Cards

Always keep several get well cards on the mantel...
If unexpected guests arrive, they'll think you've been sick and unable to clean.

In ancient times, lazy slaves

Absolute Rest

"Madam, your husband must have absolute rest."
"Well, Doctor, he won't listen to me."
"A very good beginning, madam, a very good beginning."

Patient's Request

A physician had just finished up a colonoscopy.
Before the patient leaves, he asks the physician, "Could you write a note for my wife, saying that my head isn't really up there?"

What did the deer say to the s

Seeing Red

"Believe it or not, but when I see red I'm happy."
"How's that?"
"I sell sunburn remedy."

Bruce Lee's Older Brother

Did you know Bruce Lee has a faster older brother?
Sudden Lee.

One of the worst insect massac

#joke #short #animal #koala #drinks #tea

Limited Funds

"Hey Alexa, can you check my bank account and see what Apple product I can afford to buy...."
Alexa: "Apple Juice."

I hate Twitter. It's so

You know you've won a po

Being poor is absolutely ro

Clark Kent takes direction fro

Prefixes Before and After

'Pre' means before...
'Post' means after...
To use both prefixes together would be preposterous!

Aid workers want to enter Burm

You should always ask your chi

Jesus rose ag

Don't let a pair of litt

You Really Don't Look Good

Ricky: You really don't look good.
Bob: I have a cold.
Ricky: My goodness, AND you have a cold too!

Don’t go out when it’s rai

My Last Chance

"Why did you choose to be cremated?"
"Being cremated is my last chance to have a smoking hot body!"