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Short jokes - funny one liners (2401 to 2440)Short funny jokes. These jokes are less 300 chars long, so easy to remember! These are the jokes listed 2401 to 2440. |
Some Sort of Game
My wife said last night: "You treat our marriage like it's some sort of game."
Unfortunately, this cost her 12 points and a bonus chance.
Are You Listening To Me?
I hate it when my wife says, "Are you listening to me?!"
Such a random way to start a conversation.
Body building Program
My wife just completed a 40 week body building program this morning.
It’s a girl and weighs 7 lbs 12 oz.
Pierced Nipple
At the bar last night, a woman got her nipple pierced right in front of me.
On a related note…
I suck at darts.
Good are you at PowerPoint?
- Boss: "How good are you at PowerPoint?"
- Me: "I Excel at it."
- Boss: "Was that a Microsoft Office pun?"
Me: "Word"
New Ticket Technology
A motorist was mailed a picture of his car speeding through an automated radar. A $40 speeding ticket was included. Being cute, he sent the police department a picture of $40. The police responded with another mailed photo-of handcuffs.
Wood you consider lumberjacks
Wood you consider lumberjacks to be hew man beings? It's a difficult question, but I have to axe.The mus
The museum is unveiling a mural of the great Stooge's most famous quotations. Make sure to visit this fantastic Moe-say-ic.A Personal Trainer
I decided to quit my job as a personal trainer because I don't feel I'm fit enough for the job...
I’ve handed in my 'Too Weak' notice.
Ballerina Costumes
“Costumes are very important for a ballerina. She keeps them in her special tulle box.”
Law students to study ballet
Why is it advisable for law students to study ballet?
That way their arguments will always be on point!
The Punch Bowl
My son asked me if a punch bowl is a place where you keep names of people you want to punch...
I usually keep them in my head but, keeping them in a fancy crystal bowl seems classy.
#joke #short
Are you listening to me?!
I hate it when my wife says "Are you listening to me?!"
Such a random way to start a conversation.
Gun off a 3D printer
I heard that you can now print a gun off a 3D printer, but I am not impressed.
I’ve had a Canon printer for years.
Things Never Change
It's a sign of the time.... it's like being 16 again...
Gas is cheap and I'm grounded again!
“Every Christmas I wo
“Every Christmas I would look for sooty footprints near our fireplace. I was looking for Santa clues.”
People with bad handwriting ar
People with bad handwriting are actually more intelligent. They tend to be very no legible.A New Co-Worker
A coworker named Celsius recently retired at my work, so they hired a guy named Kelvin to replace him.
He’s the new temp!
The jolly fat man spoke with g
The jolly fat man spoke with great jelloquence.Alone In the Carpool Lane
Cop: So, I’m writing you a ticket for driving alone in the carpool lane.
Criminal: You’re going to feel really stupid when you look in my trunk!
