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Short jokes - funny one liners (4281 to 4320)Short funny jokes. These jokes are less 300 chars long, so easy to remember! These are the jokes listed 4281 to 4320. |
Techies – Amazon's Alexa Silver for Seniors
#joke #short
“What did the indecis
“What did the indecisive nimbus say? Something is clouding my judgement.”
#joke #short
Answering Machine Message 37
This is not an answering machine--this is a telepathic thought-recording device. After the tone, think about your name, your reason for calling, and a number where I can reach you, and I'll think about returning your call.
#joke #short
Mr. Anderson: I am very lucky.
Mr. Anderson: I am very lucky. When I talk with my wife, she always bows her head.Mr. Smith: Why?
Mr. Anderson: Because she is taller than me.
#joke #short
A neighbor is talking to his f
A neighbor is talking to his friend who is cutting his grass in a three piece suit, white shirt, tie and dress shoes."Why are you dress like this cutting your grass?" the neighbor asked.
His friend replies, "It's a trade off. The boss gives us 'Casual Friday' if we dress up on the weekend."
"I'll never forget that Chris
"I'll never forget that Christmas. I must have spent a week peeling potatoes.""What happened?"
"Well, the seargant asked what I wanted for Christmas, and I told him the truth."
"What did you want?"
"A new seargant."
#joke #short #christmas
Fired Caddy
"Are you still caddying over at the club, Bob?""No, they fired me."
"How come?"
"I couldn't learn to laugh quietly."
#joke #short
Landing a Star Trek cameo befo
Landing a Star Trek cameo before I die will let me Chekov an item on my bucket list.#joke #short
Shania does her thing and...
Shania's estranged husband does another and never the Twains shall meet.#joke #short
Van Gogh actually planned ...
Van Gogh actually planned to mutilate himself a second time. Because he heard left ear is the best medicine.#joke #short
Anyone who can remove unsightl
Anyone who can remove unsightly leg veins is varicose to my heart.#joke #short
“Why did the man stan
“Why did the man stand on a clock? He really wanted to be on time.”
#joke #short
Political correctness has a ne
Political correctness has a new virtual reality app. It provides an amazing censory experience.#joke #short
The Law of Equality
The Law of Equality states:
The time taken by a wife when she says 'I'll be ready in 5 minutes' is exactly equal to the to the time taken by husband when he says 'I'll call you in 5 mins.'
#joke #short
“What did the sock pu
“What did the sock puppet say to the sock? Looks like you could use a hand.”
#joke #short
I was going to make a pun abou
I was going to make a pun about getting opera tickets in the mail, but that would be really Puccini the envelope.#joke #short
I was once a professional dump
I was once a professional dumpster diver. But when my career ended, I was just another has bin.#joke #short
It's easy to libel an
It's easy to libel an Icelander. #joke #short
#joke #short
Old Norse cuisine is simply...
Old Norse cuisine is simply not to my Viking.#joke #short
“Attending Mexico's
“Attending Mexico's Dia de Muertos could be a fete worse than death.”
#joke #short
Puns about my current drug pro
Puns about my current drug problems are very am using.#joke #short
A ninety-year-old couple decid
A ninety-year-old couple decide to get a divorce. They go to the judge and say, "Judge, we want a divorce."The judge says, "You've been married 70 years and now you want to get a divorce? Why did you wait so long?"
The couple say in unison, "Well, we wanted to wait until the kids were dead."
In the 1500s, the Columbian wo
In the 1500s, the Columbian worldview was met with spheres resistance.#joke #short
“When you buy at the
“When you buy at the second hand store you've reached the point of no returns.”
#joke #short
Eye alone kno
Eye alone know what it’s like to be a cyclops.#joke #short
Just because I kissed an Irish
Just because I kissed an Irishman doesn’t make me Gaelic.#joke #short
There should be no tax on stup
There should be no tax on stupidity. It’s one of our basic free dumbs.#joke #short