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Short jokes - funny one liners (7081 to 7120)Short funny jokes. These jokes are less 300 chars long, so easy to remember! These are the jokes listed 7081 to 7120. |
“Clement Moore was ty
“Clement Moore was tying his tie before going to Christmas Eve service. He said, 'Twas the knot before Christmas.'”
A boss tells his new employee...
A boss tells his new employee, "I'll give you 8 bucks an hour starting today and in three months, I'll raise it to 10 bucks an hour. So when would you like to start?""In 3 months."
Huntin' and Drin
Two guys are talking in a bar..
"My hobbies are huntin' and drinkin'."
said Art.
"What do you hunt?"
asked John.
"Somethin to drink,"
I left my Adderall in my Ford
I left my Adderall in my Ford Fiesta, now it’s a Ford Focus.A man looking for love sent hi
A man looking for love sent his picture to the Lonely Hearts Club.The reply came back, “We are not that lonely.”
“I live in an airport
“I live in an airport but when the security guard comes at night Heathrows me out.”
Pagan Wives
Q: Why do pagan girls make the best wives?A: Because they will worship the ground you walk on.
She did not need much
She did not need much, wanted very little. A kind word, sincerity, fresh air, clean water, a garden, kisses, books to read, sheltering arms, a cosy bed, and to love and be loved in return. One day, a man came home and w...
One day, a man came home and was greeted by his wife dressed in stunningly sexy lingerie. "Tie me up," she purred, "And you can do anything you want." So he tied her up and went golfing. 
What's it for?
Two young boys were closely examining bathroom scales at the department store.
"What's it for?" one asked.
The other replied. "You stand on it and it makes you real mad."
A teacher sees a lad entering
A teacher sees a lad entering the classroom – his hands were dirty.She stopped him and said, “John, please wash your hands. My goodness, what would you say if I came into the room with hands like that?”
Smiling the boy replied, “I think I’d be too polite to mention it.”
“My best friend and I
“My best friend and I attended culinary school together and then opened our own restaurant. I guess we are taste buds.”
I don't have to worry
I don't have to worry about getting kidnapped. They would bring me back in less than an hour!
Cool, Carm...
A man on a business trip went to a singles bar, approached two ladies, and offered either of them two hundred dollars to spend the night with him. One girl stormed out in a rage, but the other remained cool, calm... and collected.
An Antartican suddenly realize
An Antartican suddenly realizes his house is on fire. He immediately dials 9-1-1.The fireman answers, "Yes may I help you?"
The Antartican replies, "My house is on fire, come quick!!!"
The fireman asks, "How do we get there?"
The Antartican says, "Duh, big red truck!"
I’m about three years into m
I’m about three years into my relationship now and I've started to have erection difficulties. My girlfriend and I have different ideas as to what the problem is: she bought me some Viagra and I bought her a treadmill.
Yo momma so fat when she turne
Yo momma so fat when she turned around we gave her a Welcome Back Party.Knock Knock Collection 021
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Bach!
Bach who?
Bach of sweets!
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Bacon!
Bacon who?
Bacon a cake for your birthday!
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Banana.
Banana who?
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Banana.
Banana who?
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Orange.
Orange who?
Orange you glad I didn't say banana?
“I tried talking to m
“I tried talking to my dentist during a cleaning, but my words got flossed in translation.”
Snow white
Why did the seven dwarfs use Daz?
They wanted their little things to come up snow white!
Submitted by Calamjo
Edited by Curtis
