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Short jokes - funny one liners (8241 to 8280)Short funny jokes. These jokes are less 300 chars long, so easy to remember! These are the jokes listed 8241 to 8280. |
Where Have You Been?
The quarrel continued until Adam fell asleep, only to be awakened by someone poking him in the chest.It was Eve.
"What do you think you're doing?" Adam demanded.
"Counting your ribs," said Eve.
If you are either French or Ja...
If you are either French or Jamaican, then chez mon you.Your Halloween costume came in...
Your Halloween costume came in the mail today. I opened it. It was a rooster mask and a bag of lollipops. Going as a c*ck sucker again!?Bad Haircut
When your friend says he/she got a bad haircut and the phone
rings, tell them it's "Fantastic Sam's . . . they want to
settle out of court."
Bambi, a blonde in her fourth ...
Bambi, a blonde in her fourth year as a UCLA freshman, sat in her US government class. The professor asked Bambi if she knew what Roe vs. Wade was about.Bambi pondered the question then finally said, "That was the decision George Washington had to make before he crossed the Delaware."
“I shouldn't have plu...
“I shouldn't have plugged my iPhone into the PC at the kitchen. It's now in the sync.”
One of the courses I taught wh...
One of the courses I taught when I was a college professor was Freshman English. To my first class of students I described the basic parts of an essay: "Remember, the three parts of an essay are the Introduction, the Body, and the Confusion".Panhandlers make excellent ...
Panhandlers make excellent man a jars.“When the cigarette l...
“When the cigarette lighter salesman tried to win back his old flame he found that he had met his match.”
Moving to Berlin
Michael Jackson says he wants to move to Berlin.
As soon as the Germans heard about it they started to put the wall back up.
Two drunks are sitting in a ba...
Two drunks are sitting in a bar when one of them turns to the other one and asks, "Hey, isn't that Hortense?" The other drunk chimes in and says, "No, she looks pretty relaxed to me."Ultimate rejection
What's the ultimate rejection?
When you're masturbating and your hand falls asleep.
Computer Programmer
Q. How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb?A. None. That's a hardware issue.
“He's got a phonograp...
“He's got a phonographic memory. He repeats the exact same old lines like a scratched record.”
Q: How do astronomers organize...
Q: How do astronomers organize a party?A: They planet.
Q. How many programmers does i...
Q. How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb?A. None. That's a hardware issue.
“The carpenter came r...
“The carpenter came round the other day, he made the best entrance I have ever seen.”
Q: What do you call a Filipino...
Q: What do you call a Filipino contortionist?A: A Manila folder.
Q & A
A rapist, a gangster and a murderer are in the same car...Who is driving the car?
A police officer!
“The doors just broke...
“The doors just broke, I could fix it, but it hinges on other things.”
Late one night, a preacher was...
Late one night, a preacher was driving on a country road and had a wreck. A farmer stopped and said, "Sir, are you okay?" The preacher said, "Yes, I had the Lord riding with me." The farmer said, "Well, you better let him ride with me, because you're gonna kill him."“He sold a batch of r...
“He sold a batch of release spray to someone in jail but it was just a silly-con.”
Visit to the museum...
Visiting the modern art museum, a lady turned to an attendant standing nearby.
"This," she said, "I suppose, is one of those hideous representations you call modern art?"
"No, Madam," replied the attendant. "That one's called a mirror."
Wafo dis Check
A black woman in Chicago was admitted to the hospital for an abortion.Two weeks later she received a check for $1,500.
She phoned the hospital to ask who it was from.
The hospital said "Crime Stoppers"
“Murder with knives i...
“Murder with knives is very messy, and I suggest not taking a stab at it.”
