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Short jokes - funny one liners (9321 to 9360)Short funny jokes. These jokes are less 300 chars long, so easy to remember! These are the jokes listed 9321 to 9360. |
“How can you get a dr...
“How can you get a drywall plasterer to finish the job? They barely start and then they stop.”
Differences in expressions
Tenses
A teacher says, “Okay, class. Today we're going to be talking about the tenses. If I say ‘I'm beautiful,' which tense is it?”
Little Johnny raises his hand and says, “Obviously past tense, Miss.”
Elevator jobs
Bubba, an electrical technician, was out of work.His friend suggested he take up some elevator jobs in new constructions close by.
Bubba said, "Nope, I don't do elevator jobs."
"Why??" the friend asked.
Bubba replied, "I don't know the route."
Major Crackage
Q: Why was Oprah stopped at the airport?
A: She was getting arrested for carrying 300lbs of crack in her pants.
Answering Machine Message 10
No! NO! Not THAT! Anything but that! Not the beep! No! Please! Not the beep! Anything but the beep! AAAAIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEE!
Astrologer Booty Call... Planet
My third planet is misaligned. Can you adjust it for me?
Old Lady Visits A Museum
An old lady is visiting a museum and knocks over a large vase which smases on the ground. An attendant rushes over, aghast."That vase," the attendant cries, "was over five hundred years old!"
"Oh, thank God!" says the old lady. "I thought it was a new one."
Tough choice
A wife asks her husband: "What do you like most in me, my pretty face or my sexy body?"
He looks at her from head to toe and replied: “I like your sense of humor!”
Donkeys at Christmas
What do donkeys send out near Christmas?
Mule-tide greetings.
Caveman Booty Call... Hot
You're the hottest thing since fire. I know it's not saying much because we discovered it yesterday, but still.
Answering Machine Message 102
With apologies to Robert Burns:
O ma phone is but an ebon box,
Wha' rings when I'm awa'.
And my tape machine waits,
For your call,
This message for ta play.
So leave ye message at the beep,
Then bide ye well a while,
For I will hear your voice,
ONE DAY,
and call ye wi' a smile.
“Superconductive mate...
“Superconductive materials should be properly stored in an ohmless shelter.”
Knock-knock.
Who's there?...
Knock-knock.Who's there?
Dishes.
Dishes who?
Dishes the police! Come out with your hands up!
“Bauxite refining is ...
“Bauxite refining is a secret carefully guarded by the aluminati.”
Dealing with unwanted calls
Elvis Presley Knock Knock Joke
Knock knock?
Who's there? Wurlitzer. Wurlitzer who?Wurlitzer one for the money, two for the show...
