|
Short jokes - funny one liners (10721 to 10760)Short funny jokes. These jokes are less 300 chars long, so easy to remember! These are the jokes listed 10721 to 10760. |
How do epic poets hijack a shi...
How do epic poets hijack a ship? “Prepare to be bored dead.”#joke #short
Industrial logging isn't the c...
Industrial logging isn't the cause of deforestation. Chuck Norris needs toothpicks.#joke #short #chuck-norris
Chuck Norris shot the sheriff,...
Chuck Norris shot the sheriff, but he round house kicked the deputy.A seven-year-old girl barges i...
A seven-year-old girl barges into the bathroom where her father is having a shower."Daddy, daddy, what's that", she said pointing at his genitalia.
"Oh, uhhmm, it's a... hedgehog!", he embarrassingly replied.
"Well, it's got a hell of a big dick", she snapped back.
What's that smell? ro...
What's that smell? Eurozone.#joke #short
Chuck Norris once tried to def...
Chuck Norris once tried to defeat Garry Kasparov in a game of chess. When Norris lost, he won in life by roundhouse kicking Kasparov in the side of the face.#joke #short #chuck-norris
Q: How many politicians ...
Q: How many politicians does it take to change a light bulb?A: We don't know. They're still arguing about it.
#joke #short
The development of a new stamp
The Post Office briefly considered issuing stamps with Bill and Hillary's faces on them. However, test marketing verified that the customers would spit on the wrong side of the stamps.#joke #short
Chuck Norris' credit cards hav...
Chuck Norris' credit cards have no limit. Last weekend, he maxed them out.#joke #short #chuck-norris
Words of Wisdom
A c...
Words of Wisdom A complex system that does not work is invariably found to have evolved from a simpler system that worked just fine.
#joke #short
Chuck Norris destroyed the per...
Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because Chuck Norris only recognizes the element of surprise.#joke #short #chuck-norris
Man: Excuse me Miss, but ...
Man: Excuse me Miss, but were you born in Tennessee?Woman: No, why?
Man: Because your the only ten-I-see!
#joke #short
New Year jokes-Optimist and Pessimist
An optimist stays up to see the New Year in. A pessimist waits to make sure the old one leaves. - Bill Vaughan
#joke #short #newyear
Newton's Third Law is wrong: A...
Newton's Third Law is wrong: Although it states that for each action, there is an equal and opposite reaction, there is no force equal in reaction to a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick.#joke #short #chuck-norris
Funny kids jokes-Twins
When my daughter asked about two look-alike classmates at her school, I told her that were probably twins. The next day, she came home from school all excited and said, "Guess what? They are not only twins, they're brothers!"
#joke #short
Chuck Norris originally appear...
Chuck Norris originally appeared in the "Street Fighter II" video game, but was removed by Beta Testers because every button caused him to do a roundhouse kick. When asked about this "glitch," Chuck replied, "That's no glitch."#joke #short #chuck-norris
With high-definition TV everyt...
With high-definition TV everything looks bigger and wider. Kind of like going to your 25th high school reunion#joke #short
Electric cars are silent by de...
Electric cars are silent by deaf ignition.#joke #short
Chuck Norris once kicked a hor...
Chuck Norris once kicked a horse in the chin. Its decendants are known today as Giraffes.Funny New Year jokes-One person who makes life worth living
On New Year's Eve, Ann stood up in the local pub and said that it was time to get ready.
At the stroke of midnight, she wanted every husband to be standing next to the one person who made his life worth living.
As the clock struck - the bartender was almost crushed to death.
At the stroke of midnight, she wanted every husband to be standing next to the one person who made his life worth living.
As the clock struck - the bartender was almost crushed to death.
#joke #short #newyear
The show Survivor had the orig...
The show Survivor had the original premise of putting people on an island with Chuck Norris. There were no survivors, and nobody is brave enough to go to the island to retrieve the footage.#joke #short #chuck-norris
I have learned that if you ups...
I have learned that if you upset your wife she nags you...If you upset her even more you get the silent treatment...
Don't you think it's worth the extra effort?
#joke #short
Knock Knock
Who's there?...
Knock KnockWho's there?
Alex
Alex who?
Alexplain later now let me in.
#joke #short
Good-looking women are not wha...
Good-looking women are not what they seem, in Belarus.#joke #short
When Chuck Norris plays Oregon...
When Chuck Norris plays Oregon Trail his family does not die from cholera or dysentery, but rather roundhouse kicks to the face. He also requires no wagon, since he carries the oxen, axels, and buffalo meat on his back. He always makes it to Oregon before you.Knock Knock
Who's t...
Knock Knock Who's there?
Alex
Alex who?
Alexplain later... now let me in.
#joke #short
An obstetrician delivers a bab...
An obstetrician delivers a baby for a beautiful young woman. The baby has blue eyes, blonde hair, black skin and narrowed eye groves."You should be more careful with the orgies you have" - the doctor says.
"I just thank God he is not barking" - she answered.
Chuck Norris doesn't fly throu...
Chuck Norris doesn't fly through the air, the air moves out of his way.#joke #short #chuck-norris
My friend speared a midget in ...
My friend speared a midget in the eye with her new boobs. I guess that's what happens with imp-lants.#joke #short
Chuck Norris only has one hand...
Chuck Norris only has one hand. The upper hand.#joke #short #chuck-norris
Christmas jokes-Jolly
Q. Why is Santa Claus always so jolly?A. Because he knows where all the naughty girls live!
#joke #short #christmas
Tom Clancy has to pay royaltie...
Tom Clancy has to pay royalties to Chuck Norris because "The Sum of All Fears" is the name of Chuck Norris' autobiography.#joke #short #chuck-norris
