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Short jokes - funny one liners (1321 to 1360)Short funny jokes. These jokes are less 300 chars long, so easy to remember! These are the jokes listed 1321 to 1360. |
What do bad Eskimos get in the
What do bad Eskimos get in their stockings for Xmas?Flight To Australia
Why did Novak Djokovic pay for his flight to Australia with a Mastercard?
Because his Visa didn’t work.
We all get stung, after the st
We all get stung, after the stock market has piqued.The Same Mistake
I never make the same mistake twice.
I do it like, five or six times, you know, to make sure.
Glaucoma is a terrible rong
Glaucoma is a terrible de-sees.I'm Still Wearing It
When all this pandemic stuff is over, I still plan to wear a mask.
It hides the perpetual look of annoyance I have for most people.
What country do marathoners re
What country do marathoners retire to?NED: So, I wa
NED: So, I was a guest at a Jewish circumcision.ED: Really.
NED: The hosts actually charged admission to watch, and made us line up outside!
ED: Really.
NED: I couldn't believe their nerve—such queue bris!
Two hookers were on a street c
Two hookers were on a street corner. They started discussing business, and one of the hookers said, "Gonna be a good night, I smell cock in the air."The other hooker looked at her and said, "No, I just burped."
New Year Vow
I was going to quit all my bad habits for the new year, but then I remembered...
Nobody likes a quitter!
How do you stop a catfight between supermodels? #joke #short
Why It's Called A Diet
Why is a diet called a "diet"?
Because all the other 4-letter words were taken.
Impersonating A Politician
I can't believe I was arrested for impersonating a politician...
I was just sitting there doing nothing.
Bilbo gave up the Ring, saying
Bilbo gave up the Ring, saying “Better Safe than Sauron.”School
Teacher: At the end of this ruler is a stupid student (pointing at student).
Narrator: The student got detention for say "Which end?"
Cheap Cell Phones
As a senior citizen on a fixed income I realize that the days of cheap cell phones are over...
Now, if I fall and hear a crack, I am hoping it's my leg and not my cell phone.
Which bacterial illness is oft
Which bacterial illness is often caught by celebrities?The Meaning Of Life
I found the meaning of life.
It’s on page 937 in the dictionary between the words lie and lifeboat.
Sailors only care about themse
Sailors only care about themselves. It's always “Aye, Aye, Aye.”The inebriated bum thought he
The inebriated bum thought he was Clark Kent. He was in a drunken Super.There was a famous crooner who
There was a famous crooner who sang exclusively about peeing. He was quite the bladdeer. Some of his hits included:In his college days, Einstein
In his college days, Einstein had a psychedelic dream about hobbits being struck by lightning. He awoke and proclaimed to the world this discovery – of the Frodo-electric effect.Little known Russian history f
Little known Russian history fact: it was after only walking into a window that Gorbachev embraced glassnosed. Years of pane followed, but he pursued it untempered. He sharded a new course.Who Should Have The Toy?
The father of five children had won a toy at a raffle.
He called his kids together to ask which one should have the present.
"Who is the most obedient?" he asked. "Who never talks back to mother? Who does everything she says?"
Five small voices answered in unison. "Okay, dad, you get the toy."
Best of @PunGents #RemoveOneLetterMovies: #joke #short
Fertility Clinic
Hey, have you heard about the latest anonymous sperm bank being established by the State of Indiana?
It will be called "Hoosier Daddy!"
Lovely Child
My wife said she'd like to have another baby...
I agreed. The one we have is starting to annoy me.
