|
Short jokes - funny one liners (13521 to 13560)Short funny jokes. These jokes are less 300 chars long, so easy to remember! These are the jokes listed 13521 to 13560. |
Leaving Thoughts...
When the husband finally died his wife put the usual death notice in the paper, but added that he died of gonorrhea. No sooner were the papers delivered then a good friend of the family phoned and complained bitterly, "You know very well that he died of diarrhea, not gonorrhea."#joke #short
f a telephone rings in an empt...
f a telephone rings in an empty room and no one is there to answer it, was there really a phone call? Help me investigate this phenomenon by leaving your name and number after the tone.#joke #short
Something to Ponder
I was riding to work yesterday when I observed a female driver cut right in front of a pickup truck causing him to have to drive on to the shoulder. This evidently ****ed the driver off enough that he hung his head out his window and flipped the woman off.#joke #short
Q: What do you get if you enro...
Q: What do you get if you enroll in a liberal arts program and the only subject you do well in is music?A: A natural major.
#joke #short
Two cows....
Two cows were chatting over the fence between their fields. The first cow said, "I tell you, this mad-cow-disease is really pretty scary. They say it is spreading fast; I heard it hit some cows down on the Johnson Farm."
The other cow replied, "Ah, I ain't worried, it won't affect us ducks."
The Mistress
A husband and wife were having dinner at a very fine restaurant when this absolutely stunning young woman comes over to their table, gives the husband a big open mouthed kiss, then says she'll see him later and walks away. The wife glares at her husband and says, "Who the hell was that?"Q: What do ac...
Q: What do accountants suffer from that ordinary people don't?A: Depreciation.
#joke #short
How many bass players does it ...
How many bass players does it take to change a lightbulb?Just one, but the guitarist has to show him what to do
#joke #short
Near the end of a particularly...
Near the end of a particularly trying round of golf, during which the golfer had hit numerous fat shots, he said, in frustration to his caddy, "I'd move heaven and earth to break a hundred on this course!""Try heaven," said the caddy. "You've already moved most of the earth."
Spelling
A young monk arrives at the monastery. He is assigned to helping the other monks in copying the old canons and laws of the church by hand.#joke #short
Yo momma so hairy she's a stun...
Yo momma so hairy she's a stunt double for Chewbacca in Star Wars.#joke #short
A Rich old man, who inherited ...
A Rich old man, who inherited all his money from his father, one day asks his young wife: "Honey, would you still have married me if my father didn't leave me with all this money?".His wife smiles gently and answers: "Sure honey, you know I would marry you no matter who gave you the money".
Q: What is an...
Q: What is an insolvency practitioner?A: Someone who arrives after the battle and bayonets all the wounded.
#joke #short
Answering Machine Message 235
Sorry that we're not at home.
Please leave a message after the tone.
When we get in,
We'll give you a ring.
Until then, wait by the phone.
#joke #short
Q: Why did Ge...
Q: Why did George W. Bush RUN across the Street?A: Because the sign read DON'T WALK!
#joke #short
Grandfathers/Grandmothers
A friend who worked away from home all week always made a special effort with his family on the weekends. Every Sunday morning he would take his 7-year-old granddaughter out for a drive in the car for some bonding time. . .just he and his granddaughter.#joke #short
