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Short jokes - funny one liners (13561 to 13600)Short funny jokes. These jokes are less 300 chars long, so easy to remember! These are the jokes listed 13561 to 13600. |
School in the Summertime
Youre like school in the summertime -- no class.#joke #short
Feel Like a Woman
As an airplane is about to crash, a female passenger jumps up frantically and announces, "If I'm going to die, I want to die feeling like a woman."#joke #short
Politician Reincarnation
Q: Why are politicians proof of reincarnation?A: You just cant get that screwed up in one lifetime.
#joke #short
Interview....
Martin was being interviewed for a new job. The person conducting the interview wanted to find out something about his personality, so he asked, "If you could have a conversation with someone, living or dead, who would it be?"
Without hestitation, Martin responded, "The living one, of course!"
#joke #short
My kids love going to the Web,...
My kids love going to the Web, and they keep track of their passwords by writing them on Post-it notes.I noticed their Disney password was "MickeyMinnieGoofyPluto," and asked why it was so long.
"Because," my son explained, "they say it has to have at least four characters."
#joke #short
Two Aussie cattle drovers stan...
Two Aussie cattle drovers standing in an Outback bar.One asked, "What are you up to, Mate?"
Ahh, I'm takin' a mob of 6000 from Goondiwindi to Gympie."
"Oh yeah ... and what route are you takin'?"
"Ah, probably the Missus; after all, she stuck by me durin' the drought."
#joke #short
Car Fun
When is a car not a car? When it turns into a parking lot.#joke #short
A priest and a rabbi are walki...
A priest and a rabbi are walking down the street. A handsome young boy passes them and the priest says, "Boy, I'd like to screw him."The rabbi says, "Out of what?"
#joke #short
A Bad Gift for a Buddhist
Q: Why is a vacuum cleaner a bad gift for a Buddhist?
A: Because it comes with attachments.
#joke #short
Two cab drivers met. "Hey," as...
Two cab drivers met. "Hey," asked one, "what's the idea of painting one side of your cab red and the other side blue?""Well," the other responded, "when I get into an accident, you should see how all the witnesses contradict each other."
#joke #short
The Never Ending Joint
As pothead walks down the road, a genie appears in front of him. Ill grant you two wishes, says the genie.The pothead replies, I want a never ending joint.
The genie says, As you wish, and gives him the joint.
The pothead takes a long drag and says, Awesome! I want another one!
#joke #short
WHAT DOES A WOMAN AN
THEY BOTH WIGGLE WHEN U EAT EM.#joke #short
Single vs. Married...
Why are single women thinner than married women?Single women come home, look in their refrigerator, and go to bed.
Married women come home, look in their bed, then go to the refrigerator!
#joke #short
Oliver Twist
Dave and his new wife had just returned from his honeymoon and was settling down in their new apartment.#joke #short
My kids love going to the Web,...
My kids love going to the Web, and they keep track of their passwords by writing them on Post-it notes.I noticed their Disney password was "MickeyMinnieGoofyPluto," and asked why it was so long.
"Because," my son explained, "they say it has to have at least four characters."
#joke #short
Hang your @
Home is where you hang your @.#joke #short
Answering Machine Message 68
You have reached the Des Moines chapter of the Iowa Procrastination Society. Please leave a message after the tone and we'll get around to it...
#joke #short
What's orange and sounds like ...
What's orange and sounds like a parrot?A: I have the perfect son.
...
A: I have the perfect son.B: Does he smoke?
A: No, he doesn't.
B: Does he drink whiskey?
A: No, he doesn't.
B: Does he ever come home late?
A: No, he doesn't.
B: I guess you really do have the perfect son. How old is he?
A: He will be six months old next Wednesday.
When is it unlucky to see a bl...
When is it unlucky to see a black and white cat?Married Bliss
One evening a Husband, thinking he was being funny, said to his wife, 'Perhaps we should start washing your clothes in 'Slim Fast'. Maybe it will take a few inches off of your butt!'#joke #short
