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Short jokes - funny one liners (1841 to 1880)Short funny jokes. These jokes are less 300 chars long, so easy to remember! These are the jokes listed 1841 to 1880. |
How I Felt
After a long time, I told my hot coworker how I felt.
She felt the same way.
So I turned on the air conditioner.
How does a cannibal greet his
How does a cannibal greet his guests?Playing the Game
Our computers went down at work today, so we had to do everything manually...
It took me twenty minutes to shuffle the cards for solitaire.
Fencing is a parry nor
Fencing is a parry normal activity.
Don't be a Screw
Don't be a Screwage – share your fasteners.Really Good Friends
The older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight.
Why?
Because by then your body and your fat are really good friends.
You've Given Me A Gift
At my friends' wedding reception, the groom stood to say a few words. He turned to his bride's mother. "You've given me a gift," he began, "a gift that..."
Here he paused in thought, whereupon his mother-in-law completed the sentence, "That you can't return!"
People who drink too much and
People who drink too much and vomit in the toilet are victims of their own loo-knee behaviour.The situation in Egypt is tota
The situation in Egypt is totally MUBAR.Working At the Office
"How long have you been working at that office?"
"Ever since they threatened to fire me."
When they arrested the white-c
When they arrested the white-collar criminal he had to be fiscally restrained.A New Typeface
I’m working on a new typeface to be used for church bulletins...
I call it 'Baptismal Font.'
Did Tom get custody? N
Did Tom get custody? No Suri.The Only One
I asked my wife if I am the only one she has ever been with.
She said, "Yes, all the others were nines and tens."
A misplaced comma can cause a
A misplaced comma can cause a lot of confusion. Did you know that Nicholas Cage auditioned for Dirty, Hairy?Balancing Act
I'm a multi-tasker...
I can listen, ignore and forget all at the same time!
Why is Michael Jackson so craz
Why is Michael Jackson so crazy?Don't open any letters f
Don't open any letters from the tax audit department! They could be smeared with fee-sees.They opened a circumcision cli
They opened a circumcision clinic next to an ice cream parlour. Aka Foreskin Robbin‘.A few moments after the daught
A few moments after the daughter announced her engagement, her father asked, "Does this fellow have any money?"The daughter shook her head sadly...
"Oh Daddy! You men are all alike," sighing deeply, she replied, "That's exactly what he asked me about you."
Niece and nephew
My niece ate my nephew. Such a little munch-kin!Connected On the First Try
I got the strangest recording when I called the phone company the other day.
It said, "You have been connected to the correct department on the first try. This is against company policy. Please hang up and redial."
Book Power
Wife: "Whenever I keep money in my purse, our son steals it! I don’t know what to do?"
Husband: "Hide it in his books. I know he will never touch them."
Watch What You Order
Two men walk into a bar. The first guy says he wants some H2O.
The second guy says he wants some H2O too.
The second guy died.
A blonde walks into the librar
A blonde walks into the library. She walks up to the counter, slams a book down and screams at the librarian, "This is the worst book I've ever read! It has no plot and far too many characters!"The librarian looks up and calmly remarks, "So, you're the one who took our phone book..."
She Said I Was Immature
My wife told me I was immature...
So I told her to get out of my pillow fort.
Pulled A Muscle
I pulled a muscle digging for gold...
No worries though, it's just a miner injury.
Daily Routine
I hate telling people I'm a taxidermist.
If they ask what I do, I answer, "You know, stuff."
