The best jokes (15031 to 15045)The best jokes rated by site visitors. Top rated jokes. These are the best jokes rated 15031 to 15045. NOTE jokes sometimes might seem not to be in order. Due to better performance joke top list is refreshed only once daily. |
Smart thinking
So they came to the conclusion that on the first of the next month all commercial vehicles like cabs and buses would start driving on the right and if all went well, all private vehicles like cars and two wheelers would switch to right the next day.
Before he forgot a gift for Ch...
Before he forgot a gift for Chuck Norris, Santa Claus was real.Chuck Norris doesn't bowl stri...
Chuck Norris doesn't bowl strikes, he just knocks down one pin and the other nine faint.Drunk date
A guy enters a bar and orders two shots of vodka. He drinks the first and dumps the second on his right hand.He then orders a second round of shots, drinks the first and again dumps the second on his right hand.
The bartender sees this and becomes curious as the guy orders a third round and does the exact same thing.
So the bartender asks the guy, "Hey man, I hope you don't mind me asking but why the waste of good drinks?"
So the man says, "I have to get my date drunk."
Submitted by Curtis
Edited by Yisman
Chuck Norris doesn't brush his...
Chuck Norris doesn't brush his teeth, he scares the plaque off each morning by snarling in the mirror.Paper beats rock, rock beats s...
Paper beats rock, rock beats scissors, and scissors beats paper, but Chuck Norris beats all 3 at the same time. Chuck Norris can skip water on...
Chuck Norris can skip water on a rock.Doug Mellard: Prophylactics
I remember one point, this older gentleman asked me for some prophylactics, and at that time, my sexual vocabulary wasnt that great, you know. So, Im checking my word bank for the closest thing I have to prophylactics. Closest thing I got -- pterodactyls. I was all confused. I was like, Excuse me, sir, I hate to break it to you, but those things have been extinct for 65 million years. Donald Glover: Crazy Men Stories
Why dont women have crazy men stories? I dont really hear them. And then I realized, its because if you got a crazy boyfriend, youre going to die. Just something about men, the second they realize theyre crazy, its like, Time to kill everything I love. Chuck Norris doesn't stub his ...
Chuck Norris doesn't stub his toes. He accidentally destroys chairs, bedframes, and sidewalks.Nick Swardson: Vanna White
I think that Vanna White got the best job ever. Is that not the best job? If I were a woman, I would want that job so bad. Like, thats her job! What a country -- she just turns letters. I turn letters, but only when they glow. Im not stupid.When the Boogeyman goes to bed...
When the Boogeyman goes to bed he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.You look familiar
You look familiar, did I see you in the zoo parade ?I think you may have seen me at the zoo, I was the one who was feeding you peanuts.
I understand that's Animal Magic is your favorite show because so many of your relatives are on it.
I know your trying to insult me, but I know you like me. I can see your tail wagging.
That's funny you calling me an animal, and it's you that has the webbed feet.
You look familiar too, but that's not surprising, I collect bugs for a hobby.
You look familiar too, have I ever seen you hanging by the tail from the tree in my garden ?
Didn't I dissect you in a biology class one time?
