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Short jokes - funny one liners (5801 to 5840)Short funny jokes. These jokes are less 300 chars long, so easy to remember! These are the jokes listed 5801 to 5840. |
“Never discuss infini
“Never discuss infinity with a mathematician, they can go on about it forever.”
#joke #short
"Do you know the present value
"Do you know the present value of your husband's policy?" the life insurance salesman asked his client."What do you mean?" countered the woman.
"If you should lose your husband, what would you get?" asked the salesman.
The woman thought a minute, then brightened up and said, "Probably a poodle."
Women should come with instructions
Men say that women should come with instructions. What's the point of that? Have you ever seen a man actually read the instructions? #joke #short
A man was telling his neighbor...
A man was telling his neighbor, "I just bought a new hearing aid. It cost me four thousand dollars, but it's state of the art. It's perfect.""Really," answered the neighbor . "What kind is it?"
"Twelve thirty."
#joke #short
Illegal Scandinavian immigrant
Illegal Scandinavian immigrants aka artificial Swedeners. Immigration to Scandinavia is Oslo process, but there's Norway around it. Don't try to sneak in unless you can a fjord to pay off some skerry-looking folks.#joke #short
A Recently Spotted Bumper Sticker:
"If you were made in God's image, how did you get to be so ugly?"#joke #short
“The flower that wilt
“The flower that wilted was in desperate need of a stem cell transplant.”
#joke #short
What are the three words tha...
- What are the three words that are most often found in the inscriptions in the world?- "I love you".
- Not really. Those three words are "Made in China"!
#joke #short
Stories about rich people are
Stories about rich people are boring: yachta yachta yachta.#joke #short
In the desert you always hear
In the desert you always hear the same question: “Watch a dune?”#joke #short
Difference between a good girl and a bad girl
The only difference between a good girl and a bad girl is that good girls are more selective who they're bad with. #joke #short
Two antennas met on a roof, fe
Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love, and got married. The ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent!#joke #short
Answering Machine Message 162
Shhh! Don't talk, just listen! Meet me at the corner of Broad and Main and bring the girl. (CLICK)
#joke #short
Pierced Ears and Marriage
Q. Why are Jewish men with pierced ears well prepared for marriage?A. Because they’ve experienced pain and bought jewelry.
- Joke shared by Beliefnet member BeliefnetSabee
#joke #short
“I knew I had to pay
“I knew I had to pay the mobster the money I owed him. It was a matter of life or debt.”
#joke #short
The boss was very exasperated
The boss was very exasperated with his new secretary. She ignored the telephone when it rang."You must answer the telephone," he told her irritably.
"All right," she replied, "but it seems so silly. Nine times out of ten, it's for you!"
#joke #short
“Shakespeare spent so
“Shakespeare spent so much time at the Globe Theater because he was bored of Avon.”
#joke #short
Q: What the difference between
Q: What the difference between your first and second honeymoon?A: Niagara and Viagra.
#joke #short
