Join us on
WhatsApp
Join us on
Telegram
Join us on
Viber
Short jokes - funny one liners (8921 to 8960)

Short jokes - funny one liners (8921 to 8960)

Short funny jokes. These jokes are less 300 chars long, so easy to remember! These are the jokes listed 8921 to 8960.

Musicians and Lightbulbs

Q: How many musicians does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

A: One, two, one, two, three, four!

#joke #short
Joke | Source: Comedy Central: Jokes - Jokes provided daily from Comedy Central's archive.
  • Currently 5.00/10

Rating: 5.0/10 (1)

What does a blonde have in common with a noodle?

Q: What does a blonde have in common with a noodle?

A: They both wiggle when you eat them.

Joke | Source: Jokes of the day - Taken from Bartender's guide to Jokes, Drinks, and Poker - once good site, no longer active.
  • Currently 5.00/10

Rating: 5.0/10 (15)

SLIDESHOW #119 - Funny Photo Slideshow

“To add to the punish...

“To add to the punishment, Satan made all the tormented souls listen to elevator music. The Hells Are Alive With the Sounds of Muzak.”

#joke #short
Joke | Source: Jokes of the Day - Funny puns and jokes - the largest collection of humorous jokes on the internet. New pun added daily.
  • Currently 5.67/10

Rating: 5.7/10 (6)

Wedding Dress

A little girl at a wedding asked, "Mommy, why do brides always wear white?"

"Because they're happy," the mom replied.

Halfway through the wedding, the girl whispered, "Mommy, if brides wear white because they're happy, then why do grooms wear black?"

#joke #short #wedding #bride #mother #mom
Joke | Source: Comedy Central: Jokes - Jokes provided daily from Comedy Central's archive.
  • Currently 4.67/10

Rating: 4.7/10 (6)

Dream

I hope that I live long enough to shoot my age
#joke #short
Joke | Source: Joke of the Day - Jokes served hot and fresh daily.
  • Currently 4.43/10

Rating: 4.4/10 (7)

“An instructor at an ...

“An instructor at an ice cream parlor is a sundae school teacher.”

#joke #short
Joke | Source: Jokes of the Day - Funny puns and jokes - the largest collection of humorous jokes on the internet. New pun added daily.
  • Currently 5.83/10

Rating: 5.8/10 (6)

Ugly Drunk Driving

A policeman stops a motorist and asks, "Excuse me, Sir, have you been drinking?"

The motorist says, "Why -- do I got an ugly girl next to me?"

Joke | Source: Comedy Central: Jokes - Jokes provided daily from Comedy Central's archive.
  • Currently 5.60/10

Rating: 5.6/10 (5)

Why did the blonde t

Q: Why did the blonde tattoo her zip code on her stomach? A: So her male would get delivered to the right box.

Joke | Source: Jokes of the day - Taken from Bartender's guide to Jokes, Drinks, and Poker - once good site, no longer active.
  • Currently 3.50/10

Rating: 3.5/10 (8)

Invisible...

A psychiatrist's secretary walked into his study and said, "There's a gentleman in the waiting room asking to see you. Claims he's invisible."

The psychiatrist responded, "Tell him I can't see him."

#joke #short
Joke | Source: Jokes - Used to be - Pacific products joke of the day, but site no longer works.
  • Currently 4.75/10

Rating: 4.8/10 (4)

Q. How do you know when a woma...

Q. How do you know when a woman is going to say something smart?
A. It will start with "He said..."
#joke #short
Joke | Source: A joke a day - Free Jokes of the Day Clean Funny Jokes via Email, Humor and Entertainment
  • Currently 5.80/10

Rating: 5.8/10 (5)

Chuck Norris can win tic-tac-t...

Chuck Norris can win tic-tac-toe in one move.
Joke | Source: Daily Chuck - Daily Chuck Norris Fact
  • Currently 3.41/10

Rating: 3.4/10 (73)

Brown in the Forest

Q: What's brown and sits in the forest?

A: Winnie's pooh.

#joke #short
Joke | Source: Comedy Central: Jokes - Jokes provided daily from Comedy Central's archive.
  • Currently 5.17/10

Rating: 5.2/10 (6)

Short funny jokes-Kiss goodbye

There was this Swede whose name was Swenson. Swenson took his fat wife everywhere he went. You know why? That's because he wouldn't have to kiss her goodbye.
#joke #short
Joke | Source: Really Funny Jokes - Really Funny jokes, adult jokes, Good jokes, short funny jokes, teacher jokes, affair jokes, kids jokes, doctor jokes, funny pictures
  • Currently 4.20/10

Rating: 4.2/10 (5)

“What do you call a m...

“What do you call a musician who steals sheet music? A clef-to maniac.”

#joke #short
Joke | Source: Jokes of the Day - Funny puns and jokes - the largest collection of humorous jokes on the internet. New pun added daily.
  • Currently 5.88/10

Rating: 5.9/10 (8)

Army Nurse

Q: Did you hear about the army nurse who went to bed eating popcorn?

A: She woke up with a kernel between her legs.

#joke #short #food #eating
Joke | Source: Comedy Central: Jokes - Jokes provided daily from Comedy Central's archive.
  • Currently 5.00/10

Rating: 5.0/10 (5)

Playing Solitaire

A blonde got a deck of playing cards as a gift but she

couldn't find anyone to play solitaire with.

Joke | Source: Jokes of the day - Taken from Bartender's guide to Jokes, Drinks, and Poker - once good site, no longer active.
  • Currently 5.15/10

Rating: 5.2/10 (33)

Look good!

Robert was shaving his beard when he finds his wife Laila walk into the bathroom and she starts shaving below her waist.

Robert says, "Appraisal meeting with top boss today for promotion. Need to look nice and clean."

Laila says from the other end of the bathroom, "Same here."
#joke #short
Joke | Source: Really Funny Jokes - Really Funny jokes, adult jokes, Good jokes, short funny jokes, teacher jokes, affair jokes, kids jokes, doctor jokes, funny pictures
  • Currently 6.90/10

Rating: 6.9/10 (10)

“Some cardinals got t...

“Some cardinals got their feathers ruffled when the pope gave away the church's nest egg to the poor.”

#joke #short #food #egg
Joke | Source: Jokes of the Day - Funny puns and jokes - the largest collection of humorous jokes on the internet. New pun added daily.
  • Currently 5.33/10

Rating: 5.3/10 (6)

Redneck Spelling Test

You know you're a redneck if you're part of the KKK, but you can't spell it.

Joke | Source: Comedy Central: Jokes - Jokes provided daily from Comedy Central's archive.
  • Currently 5.17/10

Rating: 5.2/10 (6)

M & M Factory

Q: Why did the dumb blonde get fired from the M&M

company?

A: Because she throw away all the w's

Joke | Source: Jokes of the day - Taken from Bartender's guide to Jokes, Drinks, and Poker - once good site, no longer active.
  • Currently 6.18/10

Rating: 6.2/10 (11)

Dream

My grandson Jim found a penny in the grass and proudly displayed it to me.

"What good is it?" I said, "You cant buy anything with it."

"Yes you can," Jim replied promptly. "You can buy a dream in a wishing well."
#joke #short
Joke | Source: Really Funny Jokes - Really Funny jokes, adult jokes, Good jokes, short funny jokes, teacher jokes, affair jokes, kids jokes, doctor jokes, funny pictures
  • Currently 5.87/10

Rating: 5.9/10 (15)

“When the doctor aske...

“When the doctor asked the editor how he was doing, he said he had a problem with his circulation.”

Joke | Source: Jokes of the Day - Funny puns and jokes - the largest collection of humorous jokes on the internet. New pun added daily.
  • Currently 6.22/10

Rating: 6.2/10 (9)

Men Are Like Toilets

Men are like toilets -- either they're taken, or full of crap!

#joke #short
Joke | Source: Comedy Central: Jokes - Jokes provided daily from Comedy Central's archive.
  • Currently 6.00/10

Rating: 6.0/10 (6)

How to kill a blonde

How do you kill a blonde?

Put a mirror at the bottom of a pool.

Submitted by Curtis

Edited by Yisman

Joke | Source: Jokes of the day - Taken from Bartender's guide to Jokes, Drinks, and Poker - once good site, no longer active.
  • Currently 4.80/10

Rating: 4.8/10 (10)

The phases of a Project

I learnt at my workplace that every project goes through the following phases.
  • Enthusiasm
  • Disillusionment
  • Panic
  • Search for the guilty
  • Punishment of the innocent
  • Praise and honors for the non-participants.
#joke #short
Joke | Source: Really Funny Jokes - Really Funny jokes, adult jokes, Good jokes, short funny jokes, teacher jokes, affair jokes, kids jokes, doctor jokes, funny pictures
  • Currently 5.29/10

Rating: 5.3/10 (7)

“I'm not very versed ...

“I'm not very versed in writing songs, so I refrain from doing it.”

#joke #short
Joke | Source: Jokes of the Day - Funny puns and jokes - the largest collection of humorous jokes on the internet. New pun added daily.
  • Currently 4.14/10

Rating: 4.1/10 (7)

Stripper and Model

Q: What do you get when you cross a stripper with a model?

A: A boner.

#joke #short
Joke | Source: Comedy Central: Jokes - Jokes provided daily from Comedy Central's archive.
  • Currently 3.80/10

Rating: 3.8/10 (5)

Blondes Love Hunters

Q: Why did the blonde date hunters?

A: Because she heard they go deep into the bush, always

shoot twice, love to mount their prey and always eat what

they shoot.

Joke | Source: Jokes of the day - Taken from Bartender's guide to Jokes, Drinks, and Poker - once good site, no longer active.
  • Currently 5.38/10

Rating: 5.4/10 (8)

“Drivers who speed in...

“Drivers who speed in the snow often find themselves adrift.”

#joke #short
Joke | Source: Jokes of the Day - Funny puns and jokes - the largest collection of humorous jokes on the internet. New pun added daily.
  • Currently 5.57/10

Rating: 5.6/10 (7)

POV

An Insult:

I'm trying to see things from your point of view, but I can't get my head that far up my ass!

#joke #short
Joke | Source: Comedy Central: Jokes - Jokes provided daily from Comedy Central's archive.
  • Currently 4.00/10

Rating: 4.0/10 (8)

Drunk in court...

A drunk man was brought to court. Just before the trial there was a commotion in the gallery. The judge pounded the gravel on his table and shouted, "Order, order."

The drunk immediately responded, "Thank you, your Honor, I'll have a Scotch and soda."

#joke #short #drinks #scotch
Joke | Source: Jokes - Used to be - Pacific products joke of the day, but site no longer works.
  • Currently 4.50/10

Rating: 4.5/10 (4)

Really funny jokes-New sport

Tom: My wife suggested that I take up a new sport this summer.

Harry: Well, that's nice. It shows that she has your interests at heart. Did she make any suggestions?

Tom: As a matter of fact, she did. By the way, how do you play this Russian Roulette?
#joke #short #sport
Joke | Source: Really Funny Jokes - Really Funny jokes, adult jokes, Good jokes, short funny jokes, teacher jokes, affair jokes, kids jokes, doctor jokes, funny pictures
  • Currently 3.75/10

Rating: 3.8/10 (4)

The Problems With Golf


The only problem with golf is that the slow people are always in front of you and the fast people always end up behind you.

#joke #short #sport #golf
Joke | Source: Joke of the Day - Jokes served hot and fresh daily.
  • Currently 5.20/10

Rating: 5.2/10 (5)

Canni Ball!

Hey, did you hear about the cannibal who arrived late to the dinner party?

They gave him the cold shoulder!

#joke #short #food #dinner
Joke | Source: Comedy Central: Jokes - Jokes provided daily from Comedy Central's archive.
  • Currently 6.33/10

Rating: 6.3/10 (6)

Profile pic


A mother says to her teenaged daughter, "Hey, where are you going all dolled up?"

The teenaged daughter replies, "To the washroom. Need to upload a new FB profile pic."
Joke | Source: Really Funny Jokes - Really Funny jokes, adult jokes, Good jokes, short funny jokes, teacher jokes, affair jokes, kids jokes, doctor jokes, funny pictures
  • Currently 4.14/10

Rating: 4.1/10 (7)

“I thought I packed a...

“I thought I packed a memory card for my camera, but I forgot it.”

#joke #short
Joke | Source: Jokes of the Day - Funny puns and jokes - the largest collection of humorous jokes on the internet. New pun added daily.
  • Currently 5.86/10

Rating: 5.9/10 (7)

Loose Potatoes

If there were 4 potatoes in a room, which one would be the prostitute?

The one that's labeled "IDAHO"

#joke #short
Joke | Source: Comedy Central: Jokes - Jokes provided daily from Comedy Central's archive.
  • Currently 4.50/10

Rating: 4.5/10 (8)

“'Volts' - the dance ...

“'Volts' - the dance you perform after an electric shock.”

#joke #short
Joke | Source: Jokes of the Day - Funny puns and jokes - the largest collection of humorous jokes on the internet. New pun added daily.
  • Currently 4.10/10

Rating: 4.1/10 (10)

Divorce

Q: How many divorced men does it take to change a lightbulb?

A: None, because they never get the house!

Joke | Source: Comedy Central: Jokes - Jokes provided daily from Comedy Central's archive.
  • Currently 8.23/10

Rating: 8.2/10 (13)

Answering Machine Message 127


(Frantic violin music:) Hello. You have reached 435-3949. We are currently unable to answer because we are either chasing, or being chased by, bats. Please leave a message.

#joke #short #animal #bat
Joke | Source: Joke of the Day - Jokes served hot and fresh daily.
  • Currently 5.14/10

Rating: 5.1/10 (7)

PREVIOUS PAGE
NEXT PAGE

Jokes Archive

NOTE: All jokes on this web site are property of the sites they are collected from. Web site Jokes of the day is not responsible for content of jokes. We are not trying to offend, just looking for a good laugh!! If you are offended by any of the jokes, please complain to the site jokes are coming from.
This site uses cookies to store information on your computer. Some are essential to help the site properly. Others give us insight into how the site is used and help us to optimize the user experience. See our privacy policy.
Jokes of the day on RSS feed
Jokes of the day on RSS feed
Jokes of the day on RSS feed