|
Short jokes - funny one liners (9761 to 9800)Short funny jokes. These jokes are less 300 chars long, so easy to remember! These are the jokes listed 9761 to 9800. |
“The comedian stopped...
“The comedian stopped at the fabric store on his way to a comedy gig. He was looking for new material.”
Good news and bad news...
A woman phones up her husband at work for a chat.
HIM "I'm sorry dear but I'm up to my neck in work today."
HER "But I've got some good news and some bad news for you dear."
HIM "OK darling, but as I've got no time now, just give me the good news."
HER "Well, the air bag works."
Funny jokes-Does love happen?
A: If a girl is good looking and going on a bicycle, it just happens. If, on the other hand, she is not beautiful but is driving an expensive luxury car, you have to make it happen.
Kids jokes-Nobody else
Rob: "What's that?"
Jack: "Read my handwriting"
“Some people take bea...
“Some people take beautiful pictures and cut them into pieces. That's a puzzle to me.”
Animal jokes-Small mouse
A young elephant and young mouse came across each other for the first time:Mouse: "What are you?"
Elephant: " I'm an elephant"
Mouse: "Aren't you big"
Elephant: " Yes. What are you?
Mouse: " I'm a mouse"
Elephant: " Aren't you small?"
Mouse: " I, I, I've not been well"
Two girls in movie
Two girls are sitting in a movie-theater."That man beside me is fumbling his crotch", one whispers to the other.
"Just ignore it", is the answer.
"Easy for you to say. He's using my hand!".
“When the Dalmatian r...
“When the Dalmatian ran away, he was spotted two blocks from home.”
Did you call me?
Jesus, Joseph, and Mary were doing chores around their home in Nazareth when suddenly, Jesus ran outside to Joseph, and asked, "Did you call me?""No, I'm sorry," Joseph replied, "I just hit my thumb with the hammer, again."
Man: Is this seat empty?
...
Man: Is this seat empty?Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.
Son: Dad!, Dad! I got a part...
Son: Dad!, Dad! I got a part in the school play! I play the husband.Dad: Too bad they did not give a speaking role.
“When the shoe store ...
“When the shoe store owner discovered that someone had broken into his store, the police pumped him for information.”
Short funny jokes-First people in North America
How do we know the Indians were the first people in North America?They had reservations.
Inventions by Idiots
1) Inflatable dart board.
2) Glow-in-the-dark sunglasses.
3) A book on how to read.
4) Solar-powered flashlight.
5) Screen door on a submarine.
“Because they moved i...
“Because they moved into an apartment, they didn't need to cut the grass any mow.”
Nude Beach
How do you find Ronald McDonald at a nude beach?
He's the one with the sesame seed buns!
Good jokes-Red and Blue cab
"Hey," pointed out Harry, "why did you paint one side of your cab red and the other side blue?"
"Well," answered Dave, "when I get into an accident, you should see how all the witnesses contradict each other."
A man solves the problem of to...
A man solves the problem of too many visiting relatives. He borrowed money from the rich ones and loaned it to the poor ones. Now none of them come back.A man solves the problem of to...
A man solves the problem of too many visiting relatives. He borrowed money from the rich ones and loaned it to the poor ones. Now none of them come back.
A mighty crack was heard aroun...
A mighty crack was heard around the world as Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked the supercontinent, Pangaea, beginning continental drift.Animal jokes-Bunny
Thistle have to do!
How do you post a bunny?
Hare mail.
What does a bunny use when it goes fishing?
A hare-net.
Why is a bunny the luckiest animal in the world?
It has 4 rabbits' feet.
When a man with nine children ...
When a man with nine children was asked how he handled illness among his children, he said..."When the first born coughed or sneezed, I called the ambulance. When the last one swallowed a quarter, I told him that it was coming out of his allowance!"
