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Short jokes - funny one liners (10241 to 10280)Short funny jokes. These jokes are less 300 chars long, so easy to remember! These are the jokes listed 10241 to 10280. |
Bigger cycle
When I bought my daughter a bigger bicycle, she insisted on parking it next to her small old cycle.
She said, "The big one is the daddy of the small cycle - wait, I have a name for it - Popcycle."
She said, "The big one is the daddy of the small cycle - wait, I have a name for it - Popcycle."
#joke #short
D.L. Hughley: Police Following You
You ever have the police follow you so long, you get suspicious of your damn self? Maybe I did kill them people. Im a go ahead and turn myself in. #joke #short #policeman
One line jokes-Miracle drug
Liza: Do you believe in a miracle drug?Donna : Sure I do. If it is now available at the same price as last year.
#joke #short
All your base are belong to Ch...
All your base are belong to Chuck Norris.#joke #short #chuck-norris
Two antarcticans were walking ...
Two antarcticans were walking in the woods when they came upon some tracks.The first said, "You know, those look like deer tracks." The other said, "No, silly, those are moose tracks."
They were still arguing about it when a train hit them.
Lawyer jokes-Location of right foot
Absolutely hilarious exchange of words in court
Lawyer: Please tell the court the location of your left foot immediately before the impact.
Defendant : Immediately before the impact, my left foot was located at the immediate end of my left leg.
Lawyer: Please tell the court the location of your left foot immediately before the impact.
Defendant : Immediately before the impact, my left foot was located at the immediate end of my left leg.
Funny jokes-LA Police woman
Reggie : Do you know about this LA police woman who works part-time as a stripper?Archie: Well, I do hear about some people having double identities.
Reggie: You know this LA policewoman's t-shirt says,
"LAPD" on the front
and
"ANCE" on the back.
#joke #short #policeman
Equal partners
Overheard at the Maonyesho Saba Saba Fair in Tanzania, "If a husband claims that he and his wife are equal partners, then he is talking about either a law firm or a hand of bridge."
#joke #short
Funny jokes-Biblical epic star
When he was denied membership in an exclusive country club on account of being an actor, biblical epic star Victor John Mature retorted,
"Hell, I'm no actor, and I've got thirty movies to prove it!"
"Hell, I'm no actor, and I've got thirty movies to prove it!"
#joke #short
Short funny jokes-Rough up
Bubba was arrested for killing a man with sandpaper.
In court, Bubba said in his defense : I never wanted to kill him, all I did was rough him up a bit.
In court, Bubba said in his defense : I never wanted to kill him, all I did was rough him up a bit.
#joke #short
Iliza Shlesinger: Bumper Sticker
It said, War Is Not the Answer. I disagree. I think war absolutely is the answer. And if you dont agree with me, happy Fourth of July. #joke #short
Independence Day joke
Sunny : Do they have a 4th of July in England?Tommy: Of course. How else do they get from the 3rd to the 5th?
#joke #short
Guy: Is you dad still in jail?...
Guy: Is you dad still in jail?Girl: For what?
Guy: For stealing all the stars in the sky and putting them in your eyes!
#joke #short
Can't touch this
Chuck Norris can touch MC Hammer.#joke #short #chuck-norris
Q: What do you call 13 bunn...
Q: What do you call 13 bunnies in a row, hopping backwards?A: A receding hairline!!!!!!
#joke #short
Funny jokes-Weight issues
Serena was talking to her friend Dorothy about her weight issues.
"I make it a point to keep away from anything that makes me fat," she said "Weighing scales and mirrors, are some examples."
"I make it a point to keep away from anything that makes me fat," she said "Weighing scales and mirrors, are some examples."
#joke #short
A rapist, a gangster and a mur...
A rapist, a gangster and a murderer are in the same car...Who is driving the car?
A police officer!
#joke #short #policeman
Ralphie May - Dora the Explorer
Have you seen this show? If you havent, its about a five-year-old little Mexican girl thats always lost. It should be called Dora the Amber Alert.#joke #short
Ironically, Chuck Norris' hidd...
Ironically, Chuck Norris' hidden talent is invisibility.#joke #short #chuck-norris
Funny jokes-Lawyer in the house!
A lawyer, who was talking to his son about admission to college, said, "Fred, what made you decide that you want to be a doctor instead of a lawyer?"
"My point is," answered Fred, "have you ever hear anybody get up in a crowd and scream hysterically, 'Is there a lawyer in the house?' "
"My point is," answered Fred, "have you ever hear anybody get up in a crowd and scream hysterically, 'Is there a lawyer in the house?' "
Your momma is so fat...
Your momma is so far that when she walks outside with a yellow shirt on everyone yells "Taxi"#joke #short
Two strands of DNA were walkin...
Two strands of DNA were walking down the street. One says to the other, "Do these genes make me look fat?#joke #short
Hilarious jokes-Carrier pilot
A landing signal officer (LSO) shouts at a novice fighetr pilot after his 8th unsuccessful landing attempt: "You've got to land here son. This is where the food is."
Jordan Rubin: Safest Way to Travel
Whenever you tell someone youre afraid to fly, theyre like, You know, its the safest way to travel. Really? I think walking beats it. I never been walking along and just burst into flames and then fell 20,000 feet. Maybe its just the way that I walk, though. Im a real careful walker.#joke #short
Chuck Norris has two speeds. W...
Chuck Norris has two speeds. Walk and Kill.#joke #short #chuck-norris
Internet purchases
Purchases from the internet can turn out to be disastrous.
Jeremy bought a penis enhancer for $ 100. He received a handheld magnifier with the instruction, "Not to be used in sunlight."
Jeremy bought a penis enhancer for $ 100. He received a handheld magnifier with the instruction, "Not to be used in sunlight."
#joke #short
The key to the success of all ...
The key to the success of all musicians of note is their ability to stay composed while performing at a level that can't be beat.#joke #short
Chuck Norris frequently donate...
Chuck Norris frequently donates blood to the Red Cross. Just never his own.#joke #short #chuck-norris
One line jokes-Biology
Biology is the only science in which multiplication means the same thing as division.
#joke #short
Bubba and Johnny Ray, two good...
Bubba and Johnny Ray, two good ole boys from North Carolina, were sitting' on the front porch drinking beer when a large truck hauling rolls and rolls of sod went by."I'm gonna do that when I win the lottery," said Bubba.
"Do what?" asked Johnny Ray.
"Send my grass out to be mowed," answered Bubba.
Q: What do you get if you put...
Q: What do you get if you put 20 ducks in a box?A: A box of Quakers.
#joke #short
Light bulb jokes-Veterinarians
How many veterinarians does it take to change a light bulb?
Three. One to change the bulb and two more to complain that an MD makes ten times as much for the same procedure!!
Three. One to change the bulb and two more to complain that an MD makes ten times as much for the same procedure!!
#joke #short
