The best jokes (14626 to 14640)The best jokes rated by site visitors. Top rated jokes. These are the best jokes rated 14626 to 14640. NOTE jokes sometimes might seem not to be in order. Due to better performance joke top list is refreshed only once daily. |
Condoms
One day on the way home from work, I stopped at the local Pharmacy and while I was checking out, I picked up some candy to take home for me and my 7-year old son. It was a bag of Gold Coins (Gold Foil- covered chocolate candy coins).
There were many sizes, from dime to dollar. I took the bag home, and me and my son opened the bag and ate all of the coins, my son taking the bigger dollar-sized ones and me taking the smaller ones.
The next day, my wife, my son and I stopped at the Pharmacy again to pick up a few things. While my wife and I were shopping, we noticed that my son had picked up a Gold Coin Condom. Before we could catch him, he took it up to the counter and asked the Pharmacist, "What's this?"
The woman, looking very serious, said, "That's a condom, son."
To which my son replied, "My daddy BOUGHT me some of these yesterday!"
With a disgusted look on her face, the Pharmacist replied, "Those are NOT for children, young man."
And finally, my son replied, "Then I'll buy this one for my Daddy. He likes the LITTLE ones!"
Toilet Seat
A man decides to take the opportunity while his wife is away to paint the wooden toilet seat.
The wife comes home sooner than expected, sits, and gets the seat stuck to her rear. She is understandably distraught about this and asks her husband to drive her to the doctor.
She puts on a large overcoat so as to cover the stuck seat, and they go.
When they get to the doctor's, the man lifts his wife's coat to show their predicament. The man asks, "Doctor, have you ever seen anything like this before?" 
"Well, yes," the doctor replies, "but never framed."
Joke of the Day, posted everyday on getfrank.co.nz - Click to see the past weeks worth right here...
Wandering mind
Why is it dangerous to let your man's mind wander?It's too little to be out alone.
Submitted by Calamjo
Edited by Yisman
“Even though the chef...
“Even though the chef's girlfriend was grate in many ways. She had a temper that boiled easily, was half-baked and extremely kneady.”
Everyday, Chuck Norris goes fo...
Everyday, Chuck Norris goes for a short walk, just to keep the planet spinning.Chuck Norris invented the Caes...
Chuck Norris invented the Caesarean section when he roundhouse-kicked his way out of his monther's womb. Knock Knock Collection 137
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Odysseus!
Odysseus who?
Odysseus the last straw!
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Ogre!
Ogre who?
Ogre take a flying leap!
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Ohio!
Ohio who?
Ohio Silver!
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Ohio!
Ohio who?
Ohio feeling!
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Okra!
Okra who?
Okra Winfrey!
When Arnold says "I'll be back...
When Arnold says "I'll be back" in the Terminator movie it is implied that he's going to ask Chuck Norris for help.Jay Mohr: Why the English Hate Americans
I dont know if youve ever been to England, but as soon as they find out youre from America, they hate you. They just think theyre more sophisticated than we are. Theyre so pissed at us. You know what it is? Theyre mad because they lost the Revolutionary War, and they should be because there was only like nine of us. John Caparulo: Yard Sales on Memorial Day
Every year back in Ohio, we would have yard sales on Memorial Day weekend, so its like Mardi Gras for white trash. Shit hits the fan
A man walks into a bar. "Gimme a double, before the shit hits the fan."A few minutes later, same thing. "Gimme a beer before the shit hits the fan."
This goes on for an hour or so.
Finally the Bartender goes up to him and says, "Listen buddy, maybe you should pay before you get another drink."
"Oops, the shit just hit the fan." He replied.
Guy: Haven’t I seen you somep...
Guy: Haven’t I seen you someplace before?Girl: Yes, that’s why I don’t go there anymore.
