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Jokes of the day for Tuesday, 25 April 2023

Funny jokes, funny photo and funny video collected from the internet on Tuesday, 25 April 2023

National Hug a Plumber Day Jokes

It’s National Hug a Plumber Day on April 25! Find few sort jokes and one bit longer joke about Plumbers

What do plumbers and teachers have in common?
They both gotta deal with little crap all day.

What does a plumber say in a library?
"Pipe Down!"

What vegetable do plumbers hate?
Leeks.

What do plumbers and economists have in common?
They both deal with gross domestic product.

Why was the plumber tired after a day's work?
Because the work had been too draining!

What is the similarity between a plumber and a bodybuilder?
They both like to pump irons!

When the plumber had a near-death experience, he almost saw his entire life flush before his eyes!

What do you call a plumber who has become super and has his own game?
Super Mario!

A plumber received a call from a woman, requesting his help with a leaky pipe in her apartment. When he arrived, he was pleasantly surprised to find that the woman was quite attractive and had a stunning figure. As the afternoon progressed, the two grew increasingly close and intimate.
Around 5:30 p.m., the phone rang, interrupting their passionate rendezvous. The woman answered the call and then informed the plumber, "That was my husband. He's on his way home, but he'll be heading back to the office around 8 p.m. If you come back then, we can continue where we left off."
The union plumber stared at the woman in disbelief and responded, "What? On my own time?"

#HugaPlumberDay #NationalHugaPlumberDay
#joke
  • Currently 9.00/10

Rating: 9.0/10 (5)

14 Physics Jokes that Scientist will love!

Why does a burger have less calories than a steak?
Because it is in its “GROUND” state!

Have you heard of the physicist who got chilled to absolute zero.
He’s 0K now.

A photon checks into a hotel and the bell boy asks what luggage he carries. What could be Photon’s reply?
“I did not bring any luggage, I am travelling ‘LIGHT’.

How many general relativity theorists does it take to change a light bulb?
It takes two: One will hold the light bulb, and another will “rotate the space”.

Why can't you trust an atom?
Because atoms ‘make up everything’.

Why can’t you bring ‘electricity’ to parties?
Because it does not know how to ‘conduct’ itself.

You are in a high school and you see an experiment. How will you know which class it is?
If green and wiggly things are placed inside, then it's a biology lab. If it stinks, it's obviously the ‘Chemistry lab. However, if the experiment fails, it's a “physics” lab.

A neutron walks into a bar and asks about the price.
“For you sir, No charge at all!”

What does the male magnet say to the female magnet?
I saw you from the back, and thought you were ‘repulsive’, but now that I see from the front, I find you ‘attractive’.

What did a quantum physicist say before a bar duel?
Let me at-om!

What can a duck say to a physicist?
QUARK! QUARK! QUARK!

What did the Uranium-238 nucleus say to his partner?
We gotta ‘split’!

Two cats fall off a terrace at the same time, at the same speed. Which one did fall off first?
The one with the smaller “mew”.

What can a beginner’s guide to physics include?
Relativity: When the family gets bigger
Black hole: What you get in black socks
Critical mass: a group of film reviewers
Hyperspace: the place where you park your car at a megastore!

#joke #walksintoabar
Joke | Source: Jokes of The Day - By Jokes of the day visitor
  • Currently 1.67/10

Rating: 1.7/10 (6)

SLIDESHOW #111 - Funny Photo Slideshow

Grammatically Correct

Which letter is silent in "scent"...
Is it the 'C' or the 'S'?

#joke #short
Joke | Source: A joke a day - Free Jokes of the Day Clean Funny Jokes via Email, Humor and Entertainment
  • Currently 7.13/10

Rating: 7.1/10 (8)

Funny video of the day - A man is dining alone at a fancy restaurant, while...

A man is dining alone at a fancy restaurant, while... - He’s been secretly checking her out ever since he arrived but doesn’t have the courage to start talking to her. - link to page video is posted initially.
  • Currently 2.00/10

Rating: 2.0/10 (4)

Southwest

A mother and her very young son were flying Southwest Airlines from Kansas City to Chicago. The little boy (who had been looking out the window) turned to his mother and asked, "If big dogs have baby dogs, and big cats have baby cats, why don't big airplanes have baby airplanes?"
The mother (who couldn't think of an answer) told her son to ask the stewardess.
So the boy went down the aisle and asked the stewardess. The stewardess, who was very busy at the time, smiled and said, "Did your Mom tell you to ask me?"
The boy said, "yes she did."

"Well, then, you go and tell your mother that there are no baby airplanes because Southwest always pulls out on time. Have your Mom explain that to you."  

#joke
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Wednesday, 14 July 2021
  • Currently 9.48/10

Rating: 9.5/10 (44)

A Puzzle for Darwin

On the sixth day, God created the platypus. And God said: Let's see the evolutionists try and figure this one out.
#joke #short
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Friday, 11 May 2018
  • Currently 6.85/10

Rating: 6.8/10 (13)

Any questions?

Mommy has told her little girl all about the making of babies. Little Annie is now silent for a while.

"You understand it now?" Mommy asks.

"Yes," replies her daughter.

"Do you still have any questions?"

"Yes, how about little kittens? How does that work?"

"In exactly the same way as with babies."

"Wow!" the girl exclaims. "My daddy can do ANYTHING!"

#joke
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Friday, 19 May 2017
  • Currently 8.40/10

Rating: 8.4/10 (20)

Lighting a lantern is

Lighting a lantern is pure torcher.
#joke #short
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Monday, 26 December 2016
  • Currently 5.00/10

Rating: 5.0/10 (1)

Used Car

It was a small town and the patrolman was making his evening rounds As he was checking a used car lot, he came upon two little old ladies sitting in a used car. He stopped and asked them if they were stealing the car. They said "Heavens no, we bought it."
He said, "Then why don't you drive it away".
Each of the women said "We can't drive".
The officer momentarily shook his head and then asked "Then why did you buy it?"
They answered, "We were told if we bought a car here, we'd get screwed, so we are just waiting.

#joke
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Thursday, 25 April 2013
  • Currently 7.57/10

Rating: 7.6/10 (44)

Imagine that

Can u believe what people do in the church these days?

I was in the church listening tothe priest's sermon when i saw a guy smoking cigarettes inside the church.

I was so amazed that i didn't know when the bottle of beer i was holding fell on the floor.

#joke #short #beer
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Wednesday, 25 April 2012
  • Currently 4.61/10

Rating: 4.6/10 (44)

Toaster

“Did you hear the one about the woman who threw her toaster away because it kept burning the bread? She was black toast intolerant.”

#joke #short
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Friday, 25 April 2014
  • Currently 4.59/10

Rating: 4.6/10 (41)

Celtic Mortality

What is the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral?

One less drunk.

#joke #short
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Thursday, 25 April 2013
  • Currently 5.51/10

Rating: 5.5/10 (37)

I'm Working At the Moment

My boss texted me, "Send me one of your funny jokes, Pete."
I replied, "I'm working at the moment, Sir, I will send you one later."
He replied, "That was fantastic, send me another one."

#joke #short
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Thursday, 25 April 2019
  • Currently 8.83/10

Rating: 8.8/10 (35)

A man takes his Rottweiler to...

A man takes his Rottweiler to the vet.
"My dog is cross-eyed," the man says. "Is there anything you can do for him?"
"Well," says the vet, "let's have a look at him."
So he picks the dog up and examines his eyes and ears and then checks his teeth. Finally, he says, "I'm going to have to put him down."
"What?" The man was astonished. "Why? Because he's cross-eyed?"
"No," said the vet, "because he's really heavy!"
#joke
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Tuesday, 16 August 2016
  • Currently 6.17/10

Rating: 6.2/10 (6)

Three Blonds On Death Row

Three women are about to be executed for crimes. One's a brunette, one's a redhead, and one's a blonde.
Two guards brings the brunette forward, and the executioner asks if she has any last requests. She says no, and the executioner shouts, "Ready . . . Aim . . ."
Suddenly the brunette yells, "earthquake!!" Everyone is startled and looks around. She manages to escape.
The angry guards then bring the redhead forward, and the executioner asks if she has any last requests. She says no, and the executioner shouts, "Ready . . . Aim . . ."
The redhead then screams, "tornado!!" Yet again, everyone is startled and looks around. She too escapes execution.
By this point, the blonde had figured out what the others did. The guards bring her forward, and the executioner asks if she has any last requests. She also says no, and the executioner shouts, Ready . . . Aim . . ."
The blonde shouts, "fire!!"
#joke #blonde
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Tuesday, 19 July 2016
  • Currently 7.71/10

Rating: 7.7/10 (14)

The runner

Mary was having an affair during the day while her husband was at work. One day, she was in bed with her boyfriend Ralph, when she heard her husband's car pull in the driveway. She yelled at Ralph, "Hurry! grab your clothes and jump out the window, my husband is home early!"

Ralph looked out the window and said, "I can't jump out the window! It's raining like hell out there."

Mary cried, "If my husband catches us in here, he will kill both of us!"

So, Ralph grabbed his clothes and jumped out the window. When he landed outside he found himself in the middle of a marathon race, so he started running along side the others, only he was still in the nude, carrying his clothes on his arm.

One of the runners asked him, "Do you always run in the nude?"

Ralph answered, while gasping for air, "Oh yes, it feels so free having the air blow over your skin while you are running."

Then another runner asked, "Do you always run carrying your clothes on your arm?"

Ralph answered breathlessly, "Oh yes, that way I can get dressed at the end of the run and get in my car to go home."

Then another runner asked, "Do you always wear a condom when you run?"

Ralph answered, "Only if it's raining."

#joke
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Saturday, 23 April 2016
  • Currently 6.31/10

Rating: 6.3/10 (16)

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